The rose in the field...

Well I'm back in Australia.Yeah,came here to collect my stuff pack etc.Then heading back to get a job before the med semester starts.Though Im not sure when Im gonna start.On a second note,the main issue now isn't this.

Yeah,my issues with the Uni and Bank are all cheap compared to this.And no,my consoles and games are working fine.So there's nothing to that too.

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I juz feel...like questioning myself over and over again *Im not trying to commit suicide k!?*.Sigh..how do u explain these kind of things over ur blog.Its MY BLOG but I still find it awkward to explain it.Gee...maybe I can juz not blog about it right? :)

It just felt different when one of my buddies made a joke.I know its a joke but when ur mind refuses to cooperate and see eye to eye with ur heart.That really sucks,u know that feeling right?That trash shitty feeling u always get when things like "these" happen.

I knew he was just trying to pull my feet *More like pull my entire body*.But I just felt troubled deep inside.Its as if I care.Heck yes...I actually CARED.I did not expect that,I thought this was just gonna be another one of my fail attempts.But I actually CARED!?Amusing..

I've been asking myself at home,but more right after I boarded the plane last night.7 hrs to urself,and ur alone.Lots of things can go wrong.Haha..I asked if I was doing the right thing.I asked if I was going too overboard in some ways.I asked if I was being too mature and heartless in another way.I asked so much questions,I actually slept right in the middle of figuring it out.LOL.

Im affraid of hurting..but its not me thats the one to be hurt.Thats right,Im affraid and fear for the other person.For that soul is nice deep inside,though a little naggy like a grandma.But nice none the less.I wouldn't want to break any of those sensitive materials.So I asked myself over and over again.1 question led to another and soon I was so overwhelmed,I had to sleep to rid my mind of nonsense before I cause the plane to explode in mid air.

But that joke made me realise,yes I do care.I CARE.Which means,I know what that voice was telling me.Though Im wondering if Im too sensitive.If Im thinking too much.I used to doubt myself when I was wondering if I heard myself right.I doubt myself when my heart was beating the moment I saw her after our dance.Yes,she took it away,like A.Mi.Go all of it went with her.And for that one moment when we saw each other and recognised ourselves from Facebook,along came the sheep..

But thats not my problem,the most important think is I know what I want.And I make sure I know it right so as to not cause harm.

Yes...I am going sheep hunting.
And stay away,she's mine.

Till then