Flashback

Don't Quit

"When things go wrong,
as the sometimes will,
When the Road ur trudging
seems all uphill,
When the funds are low,
and the debts are high,
And u want to smile,
but u have to sigh
When care is pressing u,
down a bit,
Rest if u must,
But don't you quit.

Success is a failure,
turned inside out,
The silver tint of
The cloud of doubt,
And how u never can tell,
How close u are,
It may be near,
When it seems far.

So,stick to
The fight when
you're hardest hit.
It's when things go wrong,
that u mustn't quit.

11.9.2011

-----------
^Did I wrote that? Nawwwwww,I didnt lolz
It came from an inspiring bookmark by my gf <3

*A significant change*

Alright so Im back schooling again. *Yay~*
lmao..

Lots have been happening these few days..
Lets see :
1)I got enrolled in Med School
2)Im having fun
3)Its no where as ***** as IMU *Oh God.. **** YEA!*
4)Im back with a new resolve.. a new goal..a new aim *U get the point.*

SOOOOO Yeahhhhh~
Whats new u ask?

Well..
This.

SURPRISE PICTURE OF MY CHEST X-RAY
LOLOLOLOLOL
Yeah I was made to take a chest X-ray
Can u imagine how shocked the young radiologist was when she saw my tummy

Not . fun . at . all.
lol.


-------------------

So I went in all nervous
I was in the Uni lecture hall

And then the dean went on talking blablabla
We had the Vice Chancellor blabbing
*he looked like Albert Einstein lmao*

The 1st guy to intro himself to me turns out to be my senior

Follow by another guy,then it went on
Till the 2nd day,there were 9 of us in the group

Like..
9 jokers lmao

All have good humor *Including laughing at lecturers and nerds*
But are equally nerdy.
heh.

--------------

3 days later,we were the best of friends

8 meds and 1 dental student

Can u imagine? lmao

So we had a field trip on the 4th day
Honestly speaking,I knew it wasn't one of those "Lawatan Sambil Belajar" kind of crap..

Did YOU really blieve we still get such 'field trips'?
lol,seriously? To a Forest reserve?

Well it was more of a character building camp
A 1 day kind of thing.

--------------

For the past few days I kinda volunteered to be a leader
I lead the PBL group disguising the fact that I had previous experience

I decided to do it,since everyone was too afraid to lead

And probably its the best way to convey the msg that I infact,
had prior experience
SOOOO...Why not? right? :D

Today while assembling at the foyer before we departed for our field trip,

One of the girls recognized me
And hence pre-selected me to lead today's session at the forest reserve

I've been chosen again
And Im pretty grateful cuz they cheered me on to become a leader.

----------

So what does this pic have to do with today's event?

We were kinda instructed to construct a tower,the tallest tower using :

8 materials

Paper
Toilet rolls
Tapes (To hold the tower together)
Rubber bands
Plastic bags
TOOTHPICKS <= W.T.F
etc etc

The catch :
Ur building must have all the 8 materials included
And on top of it,it must hold a cup at the top
(where the actual height of the tower will be measured)
and u must have a stone in the cup.

Tricky,the only way to obtain other group's material,
was to bargain and BARTER.
There were 8 groups,and each group gets to choose 1 item
(which they can't see as it remains hidden beneath some newspaper before they are finally revealed to everyone)

What appears to me as toothpaste box turns out to be a box..

Holding TOOTHPICKS. gg.

lol

---------------

When the challenge is to construct the tallest tower,
naturally the 1st thing that runs in my mind
ISN'T about making something stand high and mighty,while withstanding the pressure and not toppling over.

Its about whether we can obtain all 8 materials

U see,the rule is u MUST have 8 materials in the construction
Not 1 less or else u forfeit

So my goal wasn't to stack the newspapers as high as possible

Instead,we settled for something lesser

Its stable,
Its nice and artistic

and lastly,its fun for the group

It ain't bout winning

Cuz frankly I've given up on that goal
The fundamentals is to have fun,not stress urself out

Lol its funny watching some ppl work themselves out over who is winning and who is last

To me,its childish
I've kinda mature beyond that level already

Kinda like "Been there,done that"
So to me,competing over a small teamspirit camp is fine
But some people juz take it over the limit

And kinda spoil other ppl's fun

All in all we still had a good time

And my team appreciates what I've done

I came back home,
A changed man already

Im at the helm of leadership again

And Im feeling great

Being able to know that I still retain a little of that awesome character and confidence in me

Makes me feel awesome! :D

That overflowing charisma is juz overflowing! xD

---------

Dear Im missing u so much~
Thx for being there for me,
when ****ING IMU trashed my soul

I won't let them stop me from being awesome now

Till then,

*Btw the Dean really loved our construction
he actually snapped a pic of it xD

The ladder of Insecurity

I'm climbing a ladder

A long one
*it takes 5 years to climb this ladder*

I'm afraid.

Insecure

What if I don't have the courage,the momentum to go on?

What if I fall midway through things..?

What if the ladder gave way?
Paving way for a long and painful fall?

Will I be able to get up again?


Thats right,Im about to attempt to *re-climb* the ladder of education

Whatever that awaits me at the top,is my future..

Yet I cower at the sight of this challenge..

Yes,Im afraid to attempt it again
I've fallen once,and it hurts..
like.hell.


This coming monday,I will take my 1st step

I wanna see how strong can human endurance go
How long can the human spirit and determination last

U have my words..u know who u are..

I wont be broken before I conquer all the steps
At least,not before I've climbed all the steps up this ridiculously long ladder


For those of u who still can't get what am I talking about metaphorically..


Im re-entering Med school

Thats right,
Go ahead and laugh if u want
Cuz I will have the final laugh when Im treating u ;)


Oh,and don't worry..
I'll be soft,and gentle~ ;)

Till then,
*triple post today ftw* :D

Renovation time

Alright assholes

I renovated my blog

HURRRR DURRRRRR~~

Yeah I can hear some of u jeering and sneering at this heap of cyber garbage I call,blog.

*slow claps.. followed by cricket sounds*

So! I need you guys to tell me what do u guys think bout it?


How does the font look? Everything ok?

THIS

ISN'T

AN EYE CHECK UP

JUZ TELL ME

IF U CAN READ THE WORDS CLEARLY.


Give me some feedback

Pls,and thank you =.=

Till then,

Educational outlook on the Graph of Human Relation

Alright,I guess its time for another random shout out from my Blog

Recently,my blog has been screaming things 'bout the New World Order etc etc

Today,this awesome mouthpiece to the inside of my mind,will serve as a board
Not the board from the word cardBOARD..no.
Not the board from the BOARD of Directors in some company..no.
Not chess BOARD,and the list goes on.

It will, instead.. serve as a White Board,educating u on Human Relations.


----------------
Subject HR-101
Human Relations and its co-relation with other fantastic elements in the basic Human life
----------------

Test
Time limit : Now-Forever


Definition :

1)Define Human relation in the most general aspect : (2M)

A close and well defined, intellectual interaction between 2 or more people.
Often stating common common interest,sharing of views and the unification of thoughts and expression via speech.

2)Define Human relation as it is degenerating : (3M)

A source of distrust,misconception,miscommunication,and misinformation arises.
If things are allowed to progress,it may end with a F*CK YOU and a goodbye,never speaking to one another,again.

3)Define Human relation and its co-relation to other elements in the social world : (2M)

Good Human relations expands the interaction with others in the social world.
On the contrary,BAD Human relations further reduces interaction with others in the social world.

4)List 3 factors instigating 1 party against another in human relations : (3M)

1)Source of distrust started by 1 party or the other
2)Lied to countless times
3)Actions to an extend,they are no longer to be tolerated.

5)Based on Question 4,list 2 resolution to such a situation : (2M)

1)Total loss of contact
2)Abstained interaction and speech whenever possible

Graphs explaining Human Relation :

Communication fail

Another communication failure

Failure

And,failure.
lol

Why will such simple communication between 2 people breakdown?

Thats cuz there are people trying to be funny,by doing this to another friend.

Graph for the average retard
How hard is it to be a friend?

Its suppose to be simple,no?

U meet another person
U introduce urself

And naturally,ur friends :D

Theres no introduction needed
Theres no VIP card to swap
No secret handshakes
No membership


Its that simple


Yet.how does someone screw up something AS SIMPLE AS THAT?
Its easy,they do not obey the laws of Human Relation
They are playing beyond the boundaries of friends.



Its amazing how 1 person I know falls under the red category
He managed to hog the entire red part of the pie chart to himself lmao
And he obeyed the retard's law of being a friend

By simply,messing and ****ing with your personal and social life.

------------------



This year,my friendship level with everyone has increased a whole new level
Theres a sudden rise in it
We fall,then get up and learn from things
So our friendship is definitely put to the test.

And then,theres the part with me making new friends with everyone


But then again,you don't need a graph to talk bout friendship level
Its a waste of time

Generally I don't stereotype against people
BUT,once in awhile I like to do this :


This is what I call a pie chart
Mentally portrayed and erected in my mind
Filtering people when I meet them
99.9999% of the time,people fall in the black section *I swear,lol*

But occasionally I'll come across some social crackpot who I'll never ever speak to again
Those are ppl I basically can't tolerate

AND,thats what Im blogging bout today.

<============>

After the long and elaborated introduction
Lets get to the main point


You don't have to be awesome to be my friend
I dunnid friends with benefit
I need long lasting friends,that can guide my maturity level


I dun like liars
Ppl that juz constantly slander,spread misinformation and paint beautiful stories


Has this ever been 2 way communication?

Sorry pal,I'm afraid it has always been a 1 way human relation
with urself.

Frankly I can't really remember why Im not keen on talking to u..

But I do remember this,to stay away from u
Like..away 'kind of' away.

Till then,

Invicible Threats

Those dully informed will pay because of ignorance

Those ignorant of warnings will face a harder fall
when things tear apart..

------------------

How many of u reading this are aware,or have heard of :

Bilderberg Group

Trilateral Group

Council on Foreign Relations (CFR)?

How many of u reading this,are aware of :

Al Gore's propaganda on Carbon taxes?

That Al Gore tried time and again since his appointment in the White Hse,
to implement carbon taxes.

That he and Hilary Clinton were in discussion about schemes profiting from Carbon taxes?
That he encouraged the ppl to pay a company for carbon taxes,
while in reality he secretly owned the company.

He wants to tax us,for breathing
For leaving carbon footprints on this planet

How many of u are aware,that health magazines label babies evil for producing carbon dioxide?

Its on the magazines..

On the internet

The new propaganda being spreaded around..

"Global warming is humanity's fault and we have to PAY for it"

The most fantastic piece of garbage this century.
How absurb is this?

-----------------

In the future,when apocalypse does come..

It won't manifest in the form of a big asteroid falling on Earth,

it won't manifest in the form of a giant tsunami swallowing up the Eart

But rather..

A coup'd tat..take over of sovereign nations
by the Powerful and elite bankers

Its economic terrorism..

The members of Bilderberg,CFR,Trilateral community are manipulating politics and economics to stir humanity in the way they want..


Start now,
read up

and be aware of the incoming threat

Don't wait for someone to plant knowledge in you
Do ur own research and read up

Theres nothing like waking up now
Rather than continue sinking into a trance
Obsessed with our daily lifes
Entertainment,artists and the latest tech gadgets are ntg but distractions


The time for humanity to wake up is now..

Till then,

*Btw this post isnt based on hear say,neither is it based on controversy.
its factual,I watched videos on the life proceedings and discussions recorded
And follow Alex Jones here*

Wind

When the wind blows by
It never comes back to the same spot again..

When then wind blows by
Don't expect it to sieve through again the next time..

When the wind blows by
Even time,can never undo whatever thats done


--------------------

Whatever that u mentioned

I have done it over and over


Asking if ur ok..

Being concern for u..


But when u tell me off like that

Then expect me to talk to u,do u think I will do that?

Lets be frank,even I get hurt sometimes


"Patching up a hse after the storm is fine..

But with the repeating storm beating on it,

Over and over again..

Even this hse,can't be patched back.."


I tried patching our hse back

So many times already,

Its getting to me,

then Suddenly,it strikes me that u no longer care
if this hse juz crumbles and breaks apart..



Now,is that my fault?

MAD.I.AM

A fork up my arse..

No...someone didn't literally do it..

But rather,it was hypothetically done..

The 1st surprise installed for me on this cold and lonely Tuesday morning (4am) was to get attacked..

No I wasn't playing SanGuo on FB,neither did I got physically attacked..
I received a very mild hate mail..
It was written very hastily,with sharp edges poking out everywhere..and last but not least,it was downright not very nice to read the 1st thing u open ur FB

Before I proceed,lemme sketch out what happen roughly :

So there was a small misunderstanding

That kinda made Person A unhappy
(and God forbid,but I understand why. People have done it to me before)

Person A wasn't happy so he told me he will leave something on FB

And so he did..

I kinda chose to stay out of the way while Person B and Person A 'worked things out between them..'
The rough way. Replying back on forth with CAPSLOCK. Q_Q

I kinda gotten lazy to read the whole scrap
So I posted on my FB something with relevance to Cowboys and guns
(U see..when I saw the way they worked things out on FB,I dun think anything will be solved.
To be honest,Person B is still kinda around the rough edges with whatever that juz happen)

So yeah,I made a reference to Cowboys :
That they shud put down their GUNS (and hatemails) before proceeding to working things out
Besides,who knows what they are capable of in such a rage

So I wrote something like : Put down ur guns before u hurt someone.
(Is that metaphorically wrong? Put down all that hate before u hurt another fren/loved one)

*skips to present*

So 4 days later,I receive the rude msg on FB
It was littered with "I" emphasizing dominance towards 1 sided views
(In this situation in favor of his)
things like : asking me to think in HIS shoes
I ain't
I disagree
I.
I..
and more I...

Not even a IMHO (In my humble opinion)

----------------------

I kinda wondered.. whats gotten into him?
There must be something wrong
So I went to dig around
and found a reply on another fren's shout out
I was the subject of blame now

Now,I rmb myself clearly stating that I WON'T participate in this little charade of rage and anger
It isn't my business,and Im open to LISTEN to ur views and opinion

or,if ur frustrated bout the other person
then I will LISTEN

I dun recall myself mentioning anyone specifically shooting another person/arguing/fighting/etc etc on FB
I never mention names,won't hint/point out who it was

I was kinda surprised when I saw the "I" being used together with another statement
It came out something like this :

"I ain't shooting around like a cowboy for no reason"

wait..WHAT?

The whole context of the paragraph was :
"I dun agree with what u wrote in ur comments. Maybe u got ur own way of thinking,and I got mine.But I ain't shooting around like a cowboy for no reason"

Ok..so I didn't mention who did anything,and he kinda steps up to claim responsible for it

Thats kinda humble of him,I guess..

--------------------

But seriously..

I wasn't all that impress

One thing for sure,I didn't mention anyone 'shooting around like a cowboy' on the comments section
So when I re-read what I posted on another fren's comment section

I found out it was in regards to how a person DEALS WITH ANGER
I wrote,venting it out isnt the only way
U can talk it out.

And then I got quoted and flamed
It started with Dun Agree and it goes on

-------------------

Let me get this straight,

U told me around 10pm that no one replied the mail
SO u felt disappointed

Then I went to sleep at 10+ and u sent me that msg around 11+
What happen in that 1 hr?
What went wrong?

Im not quite sure what happen

But I saw the recent shout outs on fb to be littered with things like :

Disappointed no one wanna solve it
Whats the point going Thailand while ur heart is in Msia trying to resolve something?
*or something close to that*

----------------------

Consider this a little homecoming gift
And I hope it gets straight to the point clearly for u readers out there

1)Theres ntg to resolve. Why so adamant bout trying to solve something that doens't exist?
Just bcuz I keep quiet and chose not to play sides or get involved,doesn't mean I sweep the whole misunderstanding under a rag and forget about it,right?

2)Whats the point travelling when u can't take ur mind off things?
Maybe its best to try and forgive and forget
Not easy to do,but trust me..it eases on the Hypertension a lot
Is it worth screwing a vacation over something that has been resolved?

Frankly I expected a sigh of relieve when u 1st pm me
But instead u were disappointed
Disappointed in the fact that no one replied that little battlefield u created over FB,called MESSAGES
Disappointed that no one wants to work things out
Disappointed that no one wants to resolve it,and speak out

Silence is everything in this situation,bcuz only time will help
Theres ntg to resolve bcuz its already settled among us
With the way ur going,leaving trails of fractured frenship all over the place in the wake of destruction..
I dun think anyone will be comfortable to work it out with u
When u pm'ed me,I kinda tried to talk it out,telling u its ok
Juz done think bout it
It'll be fine

but NOOOO

U came re-butting on what I said
Telling me it ain't over
Telling me theres something else to it

Who's trying to start a fight now?

Worst of all,with ur best fren

--------------------------

I know Im the listener

I know Im the counsellor of distress

I know Im the punching bag

I know its easy to let it out on me

Just,pour all that hate out and let it flow all over me
I know,bcuz after that u tell me u feel better
Ur not the only one doing it..I've taken and tried different rants from different ppl before

I shrug them off with a laugh and a "Why u zha me la?"
Then laugh,
to see u laugh along with me then apologize makes me happy
Bcuz I won my fren back,and he's no longer upset

BUT,there are times (like today),when I feel..

That Im more than a punching bag

Dude,I dunno if ur new to this

But Im UR FREN

Not a Urinal Stand k?

So don't piss ALL OVER ME,
then expect me to have NO EFFECT on what u juz did

Cuz dumping all ur shyt on a fren AIN'T COOL.
Its juz like smoking,it F*CKING AIN'T COOL.PERIOD.

I took in everything u weren't happy about

But all of a sudden,u found urself pointing that blade of distrust towards me

Before I can go "Wha..?!"

U jab it right into me

And

It

Freakin'

Hurts

My

Feelings.

-----------------------

I dun like being quoted and replied to

I certainly,absolutely DO NOT LIKE being quoted from something I DIDN'T write

Juz bcuz there ain't a war to fight anymore

Dun direct ur anger towards me

Bcuz what ur directing is frustration from the unresolved conflict

I can tell

U aren't happy that the issue ain't solved
And then u think we are walking away

Juz sweeping all the problems beneath our carpets and go : "Hey lets go for a drink"

Juz bcuz ur not happy,dun take it out on another individual

I can't really get what kinda of point ur trying to make across

But lemme voice mine out loud and clear

Venting ANGER towards a person regardless of whether he has a rock to pick with u OR NOT..

DOESN'T GIVE 2 DIFFERENT ENDINGS

Its always the same

The person receiving it will never be "UN-Disturbed" or "UN-affected"

Simply bcuz,ur directing ANGER towards him/her
Ur not directing the issue towards him/her
Its juz IM MAD IM MAD IM MAD CAPSLOCK all the way

Not convinced?

I'll give u a point
If u direct the issue,we can talk it out and work towards a resolution right?
There will be always the : WH- questions
Why? WHAT happen? When did it happen? etc

But,
If ur juz QQ'ing all the way,then mad'am..I suggest u keep ur pen1s in ur pants cuz it ain't very nice
If ur gonna throw raw anger
And disagree at every slight sign of comfort another person is giving u,
The one listening probably won't try anymore

Bcuz its redundant,ur mad
Why not let u cooldown?

And thats what everyone here has been trying to do
I know its harsh,but u pushed for this. Everyone here has been waiting for a cooldown,before re-opening 'negotiations' and start talking

Everyone is waiting for a cooldown
Then try and patch it back up

At the rate ur going,its gonna create a big hole between those at conflict
create a rift between ur frens
and create a split of miscommunication between ur loved ones


How do I know?
Cuz I've been doing this nearly all my life
Taking out my anger on others
They used to say My Emo-ness can affect the room atmosphere among my frens

Which is kinda true


Nowadays (after a fight with my girl,I've learned and changed)
I try to re-direct the negative energy

It starts with Why Im Mad?
Sometimes u'd be surprised
Juz ask urself that
I did,and sometimes Im wondering..
Why AM I mad?
This cures,and it works wonders

Next,if things come to worst
Try and re-direct all that dissatisfaction towards the topic on why ur unhappy
if ur not happy bout ur car,then talk bout the car and say why?
Dun say things like "How bout u try to put urself in my shoes,then u'll understand"
Cuz when u say that in a serious tone,its very VERY rude.

----------------------

If u do read this..

I hope u read it with an open heart

No one is taunting u

No one is trying to pick u off on a wrong day

Its juz urself

And that reflection on the mirror..

We kinda prep'ed our selves to work things out
By being quiet

So when u finally do comeback
I hope u also have opened ur heart

And look towards the brighter side of things

That I am here,as ur fren

Before,Now and Always will be

Ur fren.

I listen,
I understand,
And I take in all that nasty feelings u dun like..

But on the larger scale,
WE laugh
WE play together
WE help each other out
WE are always there for each other in a dire time of need..

I hope u can be there for me when I need u someday
(maybe its my turn next to rant to u lol)


k?

I hope so man

no..

I blieve and Im confident that u will come back,whole and restored
I have faith in u

cuz ur my fren,of course.

Btw,if ur still wondering why the Title is MAD.I.AM?
Its cuz its an obvious pun to the name WILL.I.AM

Dun be a MAD.I.AM k?

Be a FRIEND.I.AM

Last but not least~
Btw,I never like to close things up without a proper sorry and a recap
So yeah,being silent doesnt mean Im not saying anything
Saying sorry 1st doesn't mean im the coward for running away
Infact its the other way around,Im the braver one
Bcuz I dare admit Im wronged by apologizing 1st,hoping for u to accept my apology and calm down
Then finally work things out with u
Maybe u dunno me that well,bcuz this is how awesome my brain is
I'll never walk away from a problem,bcuz I cant sleep properly at night without resolving it 1st.

Till then,