Anything under the stars and sky

2011-12-09T06:05:00.000-08:00

Today, when the clock strikes 12,

I will kneel before you and pray.

I pray for my own happiness,

I pray for my family,my girl and friends alike..

I pray for myself.

-----------------

On this auspicious day,

another soul was brought into this world.

And he has reached out to the many hearts and souls in life.

My path in life, interesting and full of lessons at every corner..

Today is the day, I find myself

And understand myself.

21 years flash before me,

And I live on, stronger than ever.

My resolve may have shattered once,

but never will I hide behind my own shadow..

I'm done doing that.

I get better and wiser with age, much like wine ;)

Now if I may..

2011-11-29T20:17:00.000-08:00

Its been awhile since I lashed out/spoke my mind..
Lets begin with the introduction so that you'd understand how my brain ticks..

"I'm a 21 year old student, currently doing Medicine Degree program in Segi Uni, yes I was once in IMU and some of you might even recognize me from Newcastle (Australia).
All of those are true, and I'm not denying those. I opted out of Newcastle (Nuclear Medicine) in hopes of achieving something greater in life, being a Doctor.
And I turned to IMU for that. Now I'm here."

Something's missing,right? The puzzle is somehow not complete.. Lemme get to the juicy chunks in a bit.

Its intriguing really, how a person's perception of switching institutions is, over here compared to other countries. Malaysians,somehow frown upon such things.. And it is a hot topic among relatives, and seniors alike. Its almost 'sinful' to fail/switch Universities here in Malaysia. And what more, it makes a good meal time gossip story to tell. Come on, lets be honest.. you'd probably have gossiped bout that bastard that failed XX Uni or that girl that opted out of XY Uni some time ago. Even I do that..

The reason why it was so hard to break the silence and spill my heart (and guts) out, was because of the fear of rejection. The harsh reality of accepting this tiny little scar in my life has led me to become introverted at times. And honestly suicide was once on my mind, cuz I was unable to accept such a shame.

To be frank, it took me roughly 5-6 mths to come out of this ugly spiral. It wasnt easy accepting the fact that I had failed. And it wasn't easier talking my parents out of forcing me back to IMU. Seriously, I had not figure out what I wanted back then. I did not make up my mind,neither was I hasty in doing so ; If I did opted to restart the whole Semester there, then my decision would have been a pre-mature and half baked one. Reason being I have lost faith in the institution. Its not giving me something, and I couldn't find it till now.. That was..

The joy of studying.

I couldn't feel the reason I needed to study, it was nothing more than a dead pulse back then in my previous alma mater. Subsequently I found myself sitting alone thinking, and wondering bout the whole education system. And eventually, thought my way around it. The next thing that happen was a sudden realization, that I no longer want this. I no longer wanted to be a doctor. I no longer wanted to study here. And I lacked that flare, and desire to continue pursuing my goal.

"I was blind..
And left alone to die.."

That sudden realization, came to me on Exam eve. 1 day before the big finals.. That I had pursued this course half heartedly, and lost interest along the way, blinded by stress and a pre-mature mindset that I was a "very brilliant student". I was cocky and overestimated my own capabilities and limits. Fate did its job, and I soon cracked like an egg. All that was left, was the cleaning up and removal of my existence from that institution.

I expected the outcome. Fail, was on my mind. And frankly when I went back for the recovery classes, I could not pick up the mood and joy of studying anymore. I was permanently blind and lost. "Study 12 hrs, thats how a good student gets an A, if u do that u'll pass" says, Amy Teh, one of the pathologist there, who was giving us a 'pep talk'.

Honestly they encourage investing more time rather than studying smart to us.. I hate to show ignorance, but thankfully I learned otherwise, here at Segi Uni thanks to Prof. Hamdan.

Days, turned to months..
The pain and disgrace I endured healed,
though the experience of running through a bunch of schoolmates,
while holding ur result slip still stays etched in my mind..
It was utterly, humiliating.
And a 1st time for me..

I bucked up under the aid of family, my girlfriend, friends and counselors alike,
and found my renew faith to start anew, no longer looking back..
Not letting that ugly experience hold me back from being awesome.
I now love Medicine, and study it for 1 purpose,

I want to challenge myself to finish what I started,
and I want to understand my origins and the sufferings in life.

I have developed, a fine taste for the knowledge in Medicine study,
and I crave for more knowledge everytime..

I was once an aborted soul,
but that doesn't mean the future ahead of me is ruined.
That doesn't mean I am unable to score As,
That doesn't mean I was stupid,
That doesn't mean I'll let myself live in shame.

I come to u now, honestly sharing my experiences there,

I've been down, and now rose up again to the challenge,
and I walk on and on..
in seek of knowledge.

==================

My former alma mater reminds me of a case of unwanted pregnancy, where abortion is the common norm. Or rather, if I may..a bad case of fishing with a huge fishing net. To metaphorically "fish up" 270 students and put them in a hall to study medicine, then slowly cut down those deemed too "dumb" to study Medicine, that must have been one hell of a "fishing net" that they used. The filtration rate was simply poor. Or rather, was it me that was fooled by the fine words and namesake of the institution?

I find it unsatisfying that their actions encourage "in-born talents" to pursue medicine, while most people there frown on others that are "less fortunate". If u are brilliant, then u'd survive. On the contrary, instead of showing the less brilliant students a proper encouragement to study, they show u the door. Out.

And then u'd have a strict filtration system to trim off all these unnecessary individuals, and have the brilliant ones exchange knowledge, essentially "breeding them" to produce unique students. A haven for those that can cope with such harsh reality. This in return encourages a self-centred and "know-it-all" attitude among some students. Something I find, very very irritating.

--------------------

Those that were kicked out by the institution (that can't even provide a proper shaded car-park and a proper lab), now seek help from other Universities. Essentially making Us, nothing more than adoption homes.. I might have went to deep in thoughts, but I figured this whole cycle out a long time ago, I just did not happen to bring it up anywhere on this blog.

Honestly while some may argue that failure and drop outs were caused by an individual's mistake, it doesn't help the whole brutal cycle by an ounce when the University involved can't control their lust for money. Honestly, don't you think taking in 270 student-Doctor wannabes and then stuffing them in a hall is a little too much? For Christ sake, your abandoned ex-Shopping complex building with their cranky escalators could barely even provide a nice a comfy parking space, let alone the labs and dissection halls.

Come on, instead u provided a "practice area" filled with Sisters and nurses bossing us around on our "patient-doctor" practice sessions. Honestly, the syllabus are so much different here as compared to my former institution. 6 mths into the course and we bought a stethoscope, followed by hush hush off to the nearby Hospitals for visits. Yet many still do not know why Primaquine/Malarial Drugs shouldn't be given to hemolytic anemia patients. Or if Favism aggrevates a bad case of hemolytic anemia.
Despite such vast difference, at least I had found the joy of studying and finally understood Why and How things work.

All in all, the cycle I've gone through was a very long and tiring one. I learned a lot.. And have experience all the sour emotions and pain that comes with it..

This rant/blog was probably the best way to tell everyone that I'm no longer with IMU. Finally I broke my silence.
And for Christ sake IMU, pls stop chasing me for Sem3 fees and sending me result slips saying I failed Sem3, I WASN'T EVEN IN SEM 3 TO BEGIN WITH. F*cking irresponsible bastards, update ur goddamn system.

I'm now ready to rise up to a new challenge, and truly practice Life Long Learning..

I'm having an exam soon,
watch me scorch the battlefield,

The ground shall run red, in blood.

Till then,

An hourglass

2011-11-04T08:57:00.000-07:00

To sum up my day : Went to watch "In Time", WASN'T impressed with the acting. At.all.

BUT was satisfied with the drive home message.

--------------

Well to be honest, the movie was rather bland and boring. On the story and plot perspective, it managed to capture my attention, for the full 2 and a half hrs.

By coincidence, the drive home message was related to the short powerpoint presentation I saw during lecture. U see, my lecturers stepped into class today and gave a wonderful powerpoint presentation.

It wasn't bout the usual study material. That sort of bullcrap has been fed to us consecutively for the past God know, how many days. They were doing much more than that. They were subconsciously expanding our Emotional Quotient.

The powerpoint related teamwork to the natural flight pattern of geese.

The migrating species of birds, fly in a unique "V" shaped pattern.

They have a leader at the center, but it doesn't hog all the spotlight to itself. As the leader gets tired, another of it's kind will replace it. Hence they rotate, allowing others to show their capabilities..

If at any one point, one of the goose decides to take to the skies alone, it will feel the harsh cold wind beating against it, restricting its abilities. The others will welcome and encourage this loner to participate and fly together. Together, the work done is amplified. And much more is achieved.

If any of the birds feel sick/tired..some of them will stick to it. Accompanying it, making sure it fully recovers, or stick with it till it passes away.

Lastly, they often quack at each other, encouraging each other to keep at it as they fly through harsh weathers.

The spirit of teamwork and synergy among members was so well demonstrated in lower animals *I don't consider my species more superior than others btw, but such amazing act fascinates me*

Now the question is, Why don't we see much of it among our kind?

This is the part where the drive home message from "In Time" comes in..

Individualism was pretty much all over the place in the movie.. The need of an individual overpowers the mass. Survival of the fittest was the theme addressed in this movie. The strong survive, and the weak die for the sake of the strong to live on. This sort of individualism was termed Darwin's Theory of Evolution. Moving into the next phase and securing a high position in the hierarchy at the expense of sacrifice from lower beings of the same kind/different kind.

I will take a direct quote from the movie :
"No one deserves to be immortal, if another person has to die for it."

Similarly, in a group, no one deserves to triumph over others, if the other members are to sacrifice for it. That is, disruption in group synergy. A negative energy that many fail to see.
Teamwork is abstract, pretty much like art.

Some get it, cuz they really feel it.
Some get it, but they 'understand' only bcuz everyone says yes.

Some get it, but they pretend.

These are the worst kind of people.

Personally I try to limit the amount of interaction I have with people that disrupt the chain of positive feedback among groups. Its never nice to see the same take home message for years only centered on the fact that you suck. I guess I've seen it happen before my eyes for so many years. Yet I only realize it now.

My exposure to group work and its synergistic effects prove beneficial after all. In a way, we were encouraged to survive as a pack. Not as loners.
In the end, though your achievements are based on your individual actions, the path towards achieving such glory is often never a lonely one. Often, we seek help when we are not sure. We seek the aid of others to push through difficult phases in life.

Hence the great string of achievements awaiting at the end of a long struggle, is never spawned from individualistic actions. Failure to acknowledge such a contribution by the team, is ignorance.
Ignorance upon the fact that our friends helped us, and that we are never alone.

"It is better to admit ignorance, than demonstrate it."

------------

During the 7 weeks of my study phase, I've been grateful.

Grateful and blessed, I have wonderful lecturers.
Though they are my lecturers, I'd prefer to fondly refer to them as my inspiration.
They are my tutors in the philosophies of life.
And they all encourage the same take home message,
kill individualism
and long live collectivism.

Grateful that I have wonderful coursemates, groupmates and friends.

Grateful that my parents finally opened the door between us
and we started communicating.

Grateful that I met my girl.
She resembles a large Energizer battery packed into a tiny frame.
She gives me the inspiration to write.

Grateful to God, that I got a 2nd chance at life.
No matter what religion background u are from,
it doesn't hurt to spend 10secs praying together before a class. :)

------------

It however pains me,
that individualism has spawned in my close group of friends.
Some had it a long time ago,
I failed to acknowledge that earlier.
Some display them on and off, yet fail to strike me.

Its sad but true, I was once upon a time,
a person that understood teamwork,
and the close bond formed thru synergy among members.

Time passed, and I thought I still knew,
what teamwork and collectivism is.

I thought I knew it.

But I was wrong. I lied to myself.
That sort of spirit was long gone.
It eroded like mud, under the rain.

"Collectivism is like a blade, it must be polished.
When left to rust, it becomes individualism..
separate pieces broken from a once sturdy blade."

It was not easy sitting down and thinking bout things,
the fact that I had led the group into individualism.
I too have my own portion of the fault to shoulder.

But the fact that I chose to be an initiator,
the very 1st person to voice it out,
the very person others will frown upon,
framed for spoiling and causing disunity among the group,
shows that I still do care bout us.

It strikes me as ignorance when others refuse to acknowledge a problem within a group,
Pinning the matter on the fact that we are all busy is ignorance.
Frankly even I do it.
I myself have many a time, claim to be too busy to give "a f*ck" bout other ppl's life.

That was me, being stupid and ignorant.

I feel rather sad, that such a concern has been brought up time and time again,
only to be shrugged off by certain people as nothing more than an attention seeking stunt.

My dismissal from the latest group performance has not thrown me off track,
Though it weighted heavily on me that I have to commit to another path in life,
I have never once blamed anyone for it.
For the issue was well understood by me,
and I never wanted to be a burden.

I am sad, but becuz I cant perform anymore.
I have no hard feelings to anyone, bcuz I understand the whole story.
Neither do I blame anyone for suggesting that I quit.
U are right, I should in order to not burden the group.

I am sad, but becuz I have seen individualism spawned in this group,
It saddens me that it has become the common language spoken,
Regretfully, I failed to bind everyone closer to one another,
I did not encourage any form of participation
We were once sumthing, becuz of how close we could relate to each other.

Not becuz of our dancing skills.

I choose to chase after abstract things,
only felt by the heart.

Viva la Collectivism.

Till then,
U know u have certainly grown more mature, when u start talking and reasoning out things that surprise even urself.. I have certainly, grown in many ways. Becoming more team oriented and positive.
Regretfully, another flock of geese have demonstrated better collectivism.. That is the painstaking truth..

Lost.

2011-11-03T03:09:00.000-07:00

I am lost. Really..

Now, this isn't a casual post bout the story of my life..
No, this is so much more than that..

This is about passion, the raw emotions I used to have, when I do the things I liked.

This flame, that burns deep in me.. is now gone.

Extinguished, no more..

--------------

I have recently found myself getting back to dancing,
taking baby steps in being more active in participating..

But midway, something juz happened.

For the 1st time in my life, I'm struck with this feeling
I have never experienced before..

I question myself time and time again..

'Why am I dancing? What am I doing here??"

I lost the passion,
I lost the feel
Emotionally numb, I no longer feel the hype and passion for dancing..

Though I have yet to pinpoint the exact reason why I am like this,
I have been observing myself..
I seem to be less chirpy,
less happier with the way things are..
less happier and more tensed with the pressure of an upcoming performance..
I seem to take this more seriously cuz it is, after all, a performance..
I am simply put, less into this performance as more time passes,
I am tired, emotionally and nearly off the edge d..

I know the performance is right after my exams, no doubt it will definitely put additional pressure on me as I prepare for my End of Block exam..

I find myself unable to cope with the increasing demands of the team,
Not to say ur demands are unreasonable, but rather I am unable to deliver up to that standard..
I frankly can't oblige to a practice on weekdays, weekends and friday that often anymore.
Friday maybe once in awhile. But there are times that I must find my own personal time off..

I've been giving nearly everything to this course
(And I am very happy bcuz I got results that I deserved, and I actually enjoy my life in SEGi)
I've given whatever left next to my family and my girl..
And I gave whatever remnants and crumbs of my personal time to IX.
I find myself not relaxing, instead always running between places and wondering what to do next..

I guess those are minor reasons (or maybe excuses),

No matter what, I've lost all passion and emotion for this performance,
And I can't deliver unless I know what am I doing..
I guess I didn't really understand what Fang Kai meant when he mentioned bout 'us adhering too strictly to schedule and becoming more and more involved with dance.'

I can fully relate to his point of view now,
Bcuz all thats on my mind now is, When is the next practice? Can I attend? If not means I got more catching up to do.
I no longer find myself looking forward and enjoying friday.. bcuz now I dread it.

Its best I stay out of this one,

I guess its better for me to be by the sidelines..

All I am right now, is a dancer that can't dance.

Till then,

**btw this has nothing to do with my time management,
neither does it have to do with my uni. I kinda lost interest in the performance
and no longer prioritize it in the events of my life.
Thats all.**

Time capsule.

2011-10-28T23:02:00.000-07:00

In a blink of the eye, 6 weeks have passed..

6. weeks.

...since the day I enrolled into SEGi University College for Medicine.

Time passes very fast when u enjoy the things u do in life.

In these 6 fun weeks, I finally understood things I never did.

I finally realize the importance of understanding things,

I am now able to build a concept on tackling exams, all by understanding..

Everything makes sense when u read 'em word by word and take the time off to understand everything taught.

It pays off and I find life more rewarding,
its more than the usual nerd sessions i have at the library or home.

I find myself closer and closer towards my goal, of becoming a Doctor.

And I must say, I'm having the best time of my life thanks to the proper guidance of the Dean and his group of lecturers.

----------------------

Understanding, in other contexts,

Is what brings people together.

It bridges the gap between 2 people, holding them close

The stronger this bond becomes, the more life becomes rewarding..

For now I can only afford to cover up this pain with work..

After all, work is like morphine to me..

I use it to ease my suffering, and it is addictive..

Something in me hurt when I read what others wrote,
I can feel the tears coming out..

Clearly I have not reached that level of understanding with u, yet..

But I hope,
and I'm optimistic,
that we will find it..one day.

The Midnight Ocean

2011-10-13T09:36:00.000-07:00

Thank you..

You showed us the path to walk on..

You guided us, placed our feet on the ride track..

Then u proceed to let us explore the roads.

Though u never guide us by the hand,
u were always there incase we fall..

You pick us right up and guide us again..

----------------

Moonlight Ocean

Thx to u.. I've learned to broaden my horizons,
broaden my views on life.

I view the world in a more peaceful state.

My conscious part, residing in me,
awakens to the calling.

I see the world as one,
where all unite and eventually return to Mother Earth.

I no longer pity the living,
I no longer answer to the call of burden,
I no longer bow and heed the order of pressure.

I embrace my existence and choose to excel,
I want to fly as high as I can,
I want to flap my wings and soar the skies,

I want to tear through the clouds,
and fly as far as I can

Ride towards that little speck on the edge of the sea..
That little island called Hope,
I want to feel the warmth of the sun,
As it sets under me.

Then I will touch the stars and moon,
I will reach out to them.
Draw them on the black cold sky..

I watch the moon cast its beam all over the ocean,
together,I embrace my lover and see the ocean tides reside,

I watch the stars shine as the waves beat on my legs,
And watch the ripples form before my eyes
I embrace my love,

And tell myself how grateful I am to be alive.

To return from despair,

To view the world as a never ending source of life,

To view this chance given as a new start,

To aim and renew my faith,

I decide to fly as high as I can.

My past tells no story worth learning,
I left them behind,
on an island called Yesterday.

My companions,
some are of no value to my undertaking of life,
They weigh like anchors and I drag them like steel balls..
I drop them over the sea I flown by.

My attitude, dry and coarse like the sand,
Incompetence, idiocy and arrogance,
I left all over the magenta sky I flew by.

I fly towards a new challenge everday,

A testament that I am still moving and ticking,

A prove that I am still fighting,

A prove that I..am still alive.

Though come storm and heavy winds,
The past eventually catches up with me,
But fly forward and flap harder I will,

Though come cold breeze and hailstorms,
The present will find a spark within and ignite it,
But ignore, and concentrate on the island, I will.

Though come warm and humid days,
I will find the courage I had when I chose to fly,
And tell myself I have to live for tomorrow,
I have to live for next time,
I have to live till I reach that island,
I have to live till I embrace my love,on the rocky shores of Hope..

I can't live everyday like its the last,
for one day..
It will certainly become a reality.

I will never stop till I find this island,
I will need ur hand till then,

Till then,

Thank you,Prof. Hamdan

I..

2011-10-07T22:47:00.000-07:00

"I.."

"I walk alone.."

There are certain paths I must attempt, alone.

I will have no help from anyone.

I will endure all the pain,
for the fruit harvested at the end of this gruesome journey..
is sweet and eternally rewarding.

I will never have a word to say about it..

-----------

"I move, by moonlight"

I act, and do things as told by my heart.

I feel, and act them out.

I slumber at the sight of daylight..

Only to re-appear at moonlight's presence.

--------------

"I bleed for the greater good."

I sell myself out for the benefit of thou.

Be it friend or foe, I hath no honor remained in thy.

I give more, for those u chose to give less.

I bleed more, for those who are selfish in life.

-------------

"I walk the roads less taken,
I choose the path of pain,
at the sight of a split road."

I walk onwards with responsbility..

I am but a shadow, stripped off everything.

I wield only one, courage.

And march on, never doubting any other option..

For it is I, that decide my paths and choice in life.

Responsbility over personal gain,
I deny thyself other worldly pleasure..

"I long for u,my Priestess of the Moon.."

Till then,

Flashback

2011-09-15T03:15:00.000-07:00

Don't Quit

"When things go wrong,
as the sometimes will,
When the Road ur trudging
seems all uphill,
When the funds are low,
and the debts are high,
And u want to smile,
but u have to sigh
When care is pressing u,
down a bit,
Rest if u must,
But don't you quit.

Success is a failure,
turned inside out,
The silver tint of
The cloud of doubt,
And how u never can tell,
How close u are,
It may be near,
When it seems far.

So,stick to
The fight when
you're hardest hit.
It's when things go wrong,
that u mustn't quit.

11.9.2011

-----------
^Did I wrote that? Nawwwwww,I didnt lolz
It came from an inspiring bookmark by my gf <3

*A significant change*

Alright so Im back schooling again. *Yay~*
lmao..

Lots have been happening these few days..
Lets see :
1)I got enrolled in Med School
2)Im having fun
3)Its no where as ***** as IMU *Oh God.. **** YEA!*
4)Im back with a new resolve.. a new goal..a new aim *U get the point.*

SOOOOO Yeahhhhh~
Whats new u ask?

Well..
This.

SURPRISE PICTURE OF MY CHEST X-RAY
LOLOLOLOLOL
Yeah I was made to take a chest X-ray
Can u imagine how shocked the young radiologist was when she saw my tummy

Not . fun . at . all.
lol.

-------------------

So I went in all nervous
I was in the Uni lecture hall

And then the dean went on talking blablabla
We had the Vice Chancellor blabbing
*he looked like Albert Einstein lmao*

The 1st guy to intro himself to me turns out to be my senior

Follow by another guy,then it went on
Till the 2nd day,there were 9 of us in the group

Like..
9 jokers lmao

All have good humor *Including laughing at lecturers and nerds*
But are equally nerdy.
heh.

--------------

3 days later,we were the best of friends

8 meds and 1 dental student

Can u imagine? lmao

So we had a field trip on the 4th day
Honestly speaking,I knew it wasn't one of those "Lawatan Sambil Belajar" kind of crap..

Did YOU really blieve we still get such 'field trips'?
lol,seriously? To a Forest reserve?

Well it was more of a character building camp
A 1 day kind of thing.

--------------

For the past few days I kinda volunteered to be a leader
I lead the PBL group disguising the fact that I had previous experience

I decided to do it,since everyone was too afraid to lead

And probably its the best way to convey the msg that I infact,
had prior experience
SOOOO...Why not? right? :D

Today while assembling at the foyer before we departed for our field trip,

One of the girls recognized me
And hence pre-selected me to lead today's session at the forest reserve

I've been chosen again
And Im pretty grateful cuz they cheered me on to become a leader.

----------

So what does this pic have to do with today's event?

We were kinda instructed to construct a tower,the tallest tower using :

8 materials

Paper
Toilet rolls
Tapes (To hold the tower together)
Rubber bands
Plastic bags
TOOTHPICKS <= W.T.F
etc etc

The catch :
Ur building must have all the 8 materials included
And on top of it,it must hold a cup at the top
(where the actual height of the tower will be measured)
and u must have a stone in the cup.

Tricky,the only way to obtain other group's material,
was to bargain and BARTER.
There were 8 groups,and each group gets to choose 1 item
(which they can't see as it remains hidden beneath some newspaper before they are finally revealed to everyone)

What appears to me as toothpaste box turns out to be a box..

Holding TOOTHPICKS. gg.

lol

---------------

When the challenge is to construct the tallest tower,
naturally the 1st thing that runs in my mind
ISN'T about making something stand high and mighty,while withstanding the pressure and not toppling over.

Its about whether we can obtain all 8 materials

U see,the rule is u MUST have 8 materials in the construction
Not 1 less or else u forfeit

So my goal wasn't to stack the newspapers as high as possible

Instead,we settled for something lesser

Its stable,
Its nice and artistic

and lastly,its fun for the group

It ain't bout winning

Cuz frankly I've given up on that goal
The fundamentals is to have fun,not stress urself out

Lol its funny watching some ppl work themselves out over who is winning and who is last

To me,its childish
I've kinda mature beyond that level already

Kinda like "Been there,done that"
So to me,competing over a small teamspirit camp is fine
But some people juz take it over the limit

And kinda spoil other ppl's fun

All in all we still had a good time

And my team appreciates what I've done

I came back home,
A changed man already

Im at the helm of leadership again

And Im feeling great

Being able to know that I still retain a little of that awesome character and confidence in me

Makes me feel awesome! :D

That overflowing charisma is juz overflowing! xD

---------

Dear Im missing u so much~
Thx for being there for me,
when ****ING IMU trashed my soul

I won't let them stop me from being awesome now

Till then,

*Btw the Dean really loved our construction
he actually snapped a pic of it xD

The ladder of Insecurity

2011-09-07T08:14:00.000-07:00

I'm climbing a ladder

A long one
*it takes 5 years to climb this ladder*

I'm afraid.

Insecure

What if I don't have the courage,the momentum to go on?

What if I fall midway through things..?

What if the ladder gave way?
Paving way for a long and painful fall?

Will I be able to get up again?

Thats right,Im about to attempt to *re-climb* the ladder of education

Whatever that awaits me at the top,is my future..

Yet I cower at the sight of this challenge..

Yes,Im afraid to attempt it again
I've fallen once,and it hurts..
like.hell.

This coming monday,I will take my 1st step

I wanna see how strong can human endurance go
How long can the human spirit and determination last

U have my words..u know who u are..

I wont be broken before I conquer all the steps
At least,not before I've climbed all the steps up this ridiculously long ladder

For those of u who still can't get what am I talking about metaphorically..

Im re-entering Med school

Thats right,
Go ahead and laugh if u want
Cuz I will have the final laugh when Im treating u ;)

Oh,and don't worry..
I'll be soft,and gentle~ ;)

Till then,
*triple post today ftw* :D

Renovation time

2011-09-07T07:53:00.000-07:00

Alright assholes

I renovated my blog

HURRRR DURRRRRR~~

Yeah I can hear some of u jeering and sneering at this heap of cyber garbage I call,blog.

*slow claps.. followed by cricket sounds*

So! I need you guys to tell me what do u guys think bout it?

How does the font look? Everything ok?

THIS

ISN'T

AN EYE CHECK UP

JUZ TELL ME

IF U CAN READ THE WORDS CLEARLY.

Give me some feedback

Pls,and thank you =.=

Till then,

Educational outlook on the Graph of Human Relation

2011-09-07T02:42:00.000-07:00

Alright,I guess its time for another random shout out from my Blog

Recently,my blog has been screaming things 'bout the New World Order etc etc

Today,this awesome mouthpiece to the inside of my mind,will serve as a board
Not the board from the word cardBOARD..no.
Not the board from the BOARD of Directors in some company..no.
Not chess BOARD,and the list goes on.

It will, instead.. serve as a White Board,educating u on Human Relations.

----------------
Subject HR-101
Human Relations and its co-relation with other fantastic elements in the basic Human life
----------------

Test
Time limit : Now-Forever

Definition :

1)Define Human relation in the most general aspect : (2M)

A close and well defined, intellectual interaction between 2 or more people.
Often stating common common interest,sharing of views and the unification of thoughts and expression via speech.

2)Define Human relation as it is degenerating : (3M)

A source of distrust,misconception,miscommunication,and misinformation arises.
If things are allowed to progress,it may end with a F*CK YOU and a goodbye,never speaking to one another,again.

3)Define Human relation and its co-relation to other elements in the social world : (2M)

Good Human relations expands the interaction with others in the social world.
On the contrary,BAD Human relations further reduces interaction with others in the social world.

4)List 3 factors instigating 1 party against another in human relations : (3M)

1)Source of distrust started by 1 party or the other
2)Lied to countless times
3)Actions to an extend,they are no longer to be tolerated.

5)Based on Question 4,list 2 resolution to such a situation : (2M)

1)Total loss of contact
2)Abstained interaction and speech whenever possible

Graphs explaining Human Relation :

Communication fail

Another communication failure

Failure

And,failure.
lol

Why will such simple communication between 2 people breakdown?

Thats cuz there are people trying to be funny,by doing this to another friend.

Graph for the average retard
How hard is it to be a friend?

Its suppose to be simple,no?

U meet another person
U introduce urself

And naturally,ur friends :D

Theres no introduction needed
Theres no VIP card to swap
No secret handshakes
No membership

Its that simple

Yet.how does someone screw up something AS SIMPLE AS THAT?
Its easy,they do not obey the laws of Human Relation
They are playing beyond the boundaries of friends.

Its amazing how 1 person I know falls under the red category
He managed to hog the entire red part of the pie chart to himself lmao
And he obeyed the retard's law of being a friend

By simply,messing and ****ing with your personal and social life.

------------------

This year,my friendship level with everyone has increased a whole new level
Theres a sudden rise in it
We fall,then get up and learn from things
So our friendship is definitely put to the test.

And then,theres the part with me making new friends with everyone

But then again,you don't need a graph to talk bout friendship level
Its a waste of time

Generally I don't stereotype against people
BUT,once in awhile I like to do this :

This is what I call a pie chart
Mentally portrayed and erected in my mind
Filtering people when I meet them
99.9999% of the time,people fall in the black section *I swear,lol*

But occasionally I'll come across some social crackpot who I'll never ever speak to again
Those are ppl I basically can't tolerate

AND,thats what Im blogging bout today.

<============>

After the long and elaborated introduction
Lets get to the main point

You don't have to be awesome to be my friend
I dunnid friends with benefit
I need long lasting friends,that can guide my maturity level

I dun like liars
Ppl that juz constantly slander,spread misinformation and paint beautiful stories

Has this ever been 2 way communication?

Sorry pal,I'm afraid it has always been a 1 way human relation
with urself.

Frankly I can't really remember why Im not keen on talking to u..

But I do remember this,to stay away from u
Like..away 'kind of' away.

Till then,

Invicible Threats

2011-09-06T03:42:00.000-07:00

Those dully informed will pay because of ignorance

Those ignorant of warnings will face a harder fall
when things tear apart..

------------------

How many of u reading this are aware,or have heard of :

Bilderberg Group

Trilateral Group

Council on Foreign Relations (CFR)?

How many of u reading this,are aware of :

Al Gore's propaganda on Carbon taxes?

That Al Gore tried time and again since his appointment in the White Hse,
to implement carbon taxes.

That he and Hilary Clinton were in discussion about schemes profiting from Carbon taxes?
That he encouraged the ppl to pay a company for carbon taxes,
while in reality he secretly owned the company.

He wants to tax us,for breathing
For leaving carbon footprints on this planet

How many of u are aware,that health magazines label babies evil for producing carbon dioxide?

Its on the magazines..

On the internet

The new propaganda being spreaded around..

"Global warming is humanity's fault and we have to PAY for it"

The most fantastic piece of garbage this century.
How absurb is this?

-----------------

In the future,when apocalypse does come..

It won't manifest in the form of a big asteroid falling on Earth,

it won't manifest in the form of a giant tsunami swallowing up the Eart

But rather..

A coup'd tat..take over of sovereign nations
by the Powerful and elite bankers

Its economic terrorism..

The members of Bilderberg,CFR,Trilateral community are manipulating politics and economics to stir humanity in the way they want..

Start now,
read up

and be aware of the incoming threat

Don't wait for someone to plant knowledge in you
Do ur own research and read up

Theres nothing like waking up now
Rather than continue sinking into a trance
Obsessed with our daily lifes
Entertainment,artists and the latest tech gadgets are ntg but distractions

The time for humanity to wake up is now..

Till then,

*Btw this post isnt based on hear say,neither is it based on controversy.
its factual,I watched videos on the life proceedings and discussions recorded
And follow Alex Jones here*

Wind

2011-09-04T21:53:00.000-07:00

When the wind blows by
It never comes back to the same spot again..

When then wind blows by
Don't expect it to sieve through again the next time..

When the wind blows by
Even time,can never undo whatever thats done

--------------------

Whatever that u mentioned

I have done it over and over

Asking if ur ok..

Being concern for u..

But when u tell me off like that

Then expect me to talk to u,do u think I will do that?

Lets be frank,even I get hurt sometimes

"Patching up a hse after the storm is fine..

But with the repeating storm beating on it,

Over and over again..

Even this hse,can't be patched back.."

I tried patching our hse back

So many times already,

Its getting to me,

then Suddenly,it strikes me that u no longer care
if this hse juz crumbles and breaks apart..

Now,is that my fault?

MAD.I.AM

2011-08-29T13:48:00.000-07:00

A fork up my arse..

No...someone didn't literally do it..

But rather,it was hypothetically done..

The 1st surprise installed for me on this cold and lonely Tuesday morning (4am) was to get attacked..

No I wasn't playing SanGuo on FB,neither did I got physically attacked..
I received a very mild hate mail..
It was written very hastily,with sharp edges poking out everywhere..and last but not least,it was downright not very nice to read the 1st thing u open ur FB

Before I proceed,lemme sketch out what happen roughly :

So there was a small misunderstanding

That kinda made Person A unhappy
(and God forbid,but I understand why. People have done it to me before)

Person A wasn't happy so he told me he will leave something on FB

And so he did..

I kinda chose to stay out of the way while Person B and Person A 'worked things out between them..'
The rough way. Replying back on forth with CAPSLOCK. Q_Q

I kinda gotten lazy to read the whole scrap
So I posted on my FB something with relevance to Cowboys and guns
(U see..when I saw the way they worked things out on FB,I dun think anything will be solved.
To be honest,Person B is still kinda around the rough edges with whatever that juz happen)

So yeah,I made a reference to Cowboys :
That they shud put down their GUNS (and hatemails) before proceeding to working things out
Besides,who knows what they are capable of in such a rage

So I wrote something like : Put down ur guns before u hurt someone.
(Is that metaphorically wrong? Put down all that hate before u hurt another fren/loved one)

*skips to present*

So 4 days later,I receive the rude msg on FB
It was littered with "I" emphasizing dominance towards 1 sided views
(In this situation in favor of his)
things like : asking me to think in HIS shoes
I ain't
I disagree
I.
I..
and more I...

Not even a IMHO (In my humble opinion)

----------------------

I kinda wondered.. whats gotten into him?
There must be something wrong
So I went to dig around
and found a reply on another fren's shout out
I was the subject of blame now

Now,I rmb myself clearly stating that I WON'T participate in this little charade of rage and anger
It isn't my business,and Im open to LISTEN to ur views and opinion

or,if ur frustrated bout the other person
then I will LISTEN

I dun recall myself mentioning anyone specifically shooting another person/arguing/fighting/etc etc on FB
I never mention names,won't hint/point out who it was

I was kinda surprised when I saw the "I" being used together with another statement
It came out something like this :

"I ain't shooting around like a cowboy for no reason"

wait..WHAT?

The whole context of the paragraph was :
"I dun agree with what u wrote in ur comments. Maybe u got ur own way of thinking,and I got mine.But I ain't shooting around like a cowboy for no reason"

Ok..so I didn't mention who did anything,and he kinda steps up to claim responsible for it

Thats kinda humble of him,I guess..

--------------------

But seriously..

I wasn't all that impress

One thing for sure,I didn't mention anyone 'shooting around like a cowboy' on the comments section
So when I re-read what I posted on another fren's comment section

I found out it was in regards to how a person DEALS WITH ANGER
I wrote,venting it out isnt the only way
U can talk it out.

And then I got quoted and flamed
It started with Dun Agree and it goes on

-------------------

Let me get this straight,

U told me around 10pm that no one replied the mail
SO u felt disappointed

Then I went to sleep at 10+ and u sent me that msg around 11+
What happen in that 1 hr?
What went wrong?

Im not quite sure what happen

But I saw the recent shout outs on fb to be littered with things like :

Disappointed no one wanna solve it
Whats the point going Thailand while ur heart is in Msia trying to resolve something?
*or something close to that*

----------------------

Consider this a little homecoming gift
And I hope it gets straight to the point clearly for u readers out there

1)Theres ntg to resolve. Why so adamant bout trying to solve something that doens't exist?
Just bcuz I keep quiet and chose not to play sides or get involved,doesn't mean I sweep the whole misunderstanding under a rag and forget about it,right?

2)Whats the point travelling when u can't take ur mind off things?
Maybe its best to try and forgive and forget
Not easy to do,but trust me..it eases on the Hypertension a lot
Is it worth screwing a vacation over something that has been resolved?

Frankly I expected a sigh of relieve when u 1st pm me
But instead u were disappointed
Disappointed in the fact that no one replied that little battlefield u created over FB,called MESSAGES
Disappointed that no one wants to work things out
Disappointed that no one wants to resolve it,and speak out

Silence is everything in this situation,bcuz only time will help
Theres ntg to resolve bcuz its already settled among us
With the way ur going,leaving trails of fractured frenship all over the place in the wake of destruction..
I dun think anyone will be comfortable to work it out with u
When u pm'ed me,I kinda tried to talk it out,telling u its ok
Juz done think bout it
It'll be fine

but NOOOO

U came re-butting on what I said
Telling me it ain't over
Telling me theres something else to it

Who's trying to start a fight now?

Worst of all,with ur best fren

--------------------------

I know Im the listener

I know Im the counsellor of distress

I know Im the punching bag

I know its easy to let it out on me

Just,pour all that hate out and let it flow all over me
I know,bcuz after that u tell me u feel better
Ur not the only one doing it..I've taken and tried different rants from different ppl before

I shrug them off with a laugh and a "Why u zha me la?"
Then laugh,
to see u laugh along with me then apologize makes me happy
Bcuz I won my fren back,and he's no longer upset

BUT,there are times (like today),when I feel..

That Im more than a punching bag

Dude,I dunno if ur new to this

But Im UR FREN

Not a Urinal Stand k?

So don't piss ALL OVER ME,
then expect me to have NO EFFECT on what u juz did

Cuz dumping all ur shyt on a fren AIN'T COOL.
Its juz like smoking,it F*CKING AIN'T COOL.PERIOD.

I took in everything u weren't happy about

But all of a sudden,u found urself pointing that blade of distrust towards me

Before I can go "Wha..?!"

U jab it right into me

And

It

Freakin'

Hurts

My

Feelings.

-----------------------

I dun like being quoted and replied to

I certainly,absolutely DO NOT LIKE being quoted from something I DIDN'T write

Juz bcuz there ain't a war to fight anymore

Dun direct ur anger towards me

Bcuz what ur directing is frustration from the unresolved conflict

I can tell

U aren't happy that the issue ain't solved
And then u think we are walking away

Juz sweeping all the problems beneath our carpets and go : "Hey lets go for a drink"

Juz bcuz ur not happy,dun take it out on another individual

I can't really get what kinda of point ur trying to make across

But lemme voice mine out loud and clear

Venting ANGER towards a person regardless of whether he has a rock to pick with u OR NOT..

DOESN'T GIVE 2 DIFFERENT ENDINGS

Its always the same

The person receiving it will never be "UN-Disturbed" or "UN-affected"

Simply bcuz,ur directing ANGER towards him/her
Ur not directing the issue towards him/her
Its juz IM MAD IM MAD IM MAD CAPSLOCK all the way

Not convinced?

I'll give u a point
If u direct the issue,we can talk it out and work towards a resolution right?
There will be always the : WH- questions
Why? WHAT happen? When did it happen? etc

But,
If ur juz QQ'ing all the way,then mad'am..I suggest u keep ur pen1s in ur pants cuz it ain't very nice
If ur gonna throw raw anger
And disagree at every slight sign of comfort another person is giving u,
The one listening probably won't try anymore

Bcuz its redundant,ur mad
Why not let u cooldown?

And thats what everyone here has been trying to do
I know its harsh,but u pushed for this. Everyone here has been waiting for a cooldown,before re-opening 'negotiations' and start talking

Everyone is waiting for a cooldown
Then try and patch it back up

At the rate ur going,its gonna create a big hole between those at conflict
create a rift between ur frens
and create a split of miscommunication between ur loved ones

How do I know?
Cuz I've been doing this nearly all my life
Taking out my anger on others
They used to say My Emo-ness can affect the room atmosphere among my frens

Which is kinda true

Nowadays (after a fight with my girl,I've learned and changed)
I try to re-direct the negative energy

It starts with Why Im Mad?
Sometimes u'd be surprised
Juz ask urself that
I did,and sometimes Im wondering..
Why AM I mad?
This cures,and it works wonders

Next,if things come to worst
Try and re-direct all that dissatisfaction towards the topic on why ur unhappy
if ur not happy bout ur car,then talk bout the car and say why?
Dun say things like "How bout u try to put urself in my shoes,then u'll understand"
Cuz when u say that in a serious tone,its very VERY rude.

----------------------

If u do read this..

I hope u read it with an open heart

No one is taunting u

No one is trying to pick u off on a wrong day

Its juz urself

And that reflection on the mirror..

We kinda prep'ed our selves to work things out
By being quiet

So when u finally do comeback
I hope u also have opened ur heart

And look towards the brighter side of things

That I am here,as ur fren

Before,Now and Always will be

Ur fren.

I listen,
I understand,
And I take in all that nasty feelings u dun like..

But on the larger scale,
WE laugh
WE play together
WE help each other out
WE are always there for each other in a dire time of need..

I hope u can be there for me when I need u someday
(maybe its my turn next to rant to u lol)

k?

I hope so man

no..

I blieve and Im confident that u will come back,whole and restored
I have faith in u

cuz ur my fren,of course.

Btw,if ur still wondering why the Title is MAD.I.AM?
Its cuz its an obvious pun to the name WILL.I.AM

Dun be a MAD.I.AM k?

Be a FRIEND.I.AM

Last but not least~
Btw,I never like to close things up without a proper sorry and a recap
So yeah,being silent doesnt mean Im not saying anything
Saying sorry 1st doesn't mean im the coward for running away
Infact its the other way around,Im the braver one
Bcuz I dare admit Im wronged by apologizing 1st,hoping for u to accept my apology and calm down
Then finally work things out with u
Maybe u dunno me that well,bcuz this is how awesome my brain is
I'll never walk away from a problem,bcuz I cant sleep properly at night without resolving it 1st.

Till then,

The Hidden Threat

2011-08-29T02:48:00.000-07:00

They watch from the shadows..

They plan from the shadows..scheming

They observe and plot

They are no longer a conspiracy theory

For they distract u daily

With things such as the latest handphone

With news of the latest celebrity

The latest songs,gossips the media

Watch it all here

Watch what ur watching,fox keeps feeding us toxic..

Till then,

Eh..I'm getting lazy =.=

2011-08-22T20:54:00.001-07:00

Alright..

So I'm kinda getting lazy recently
This update is kinda big,full of pics (I'll let them do the talking,rather than yapyapyap all the way)

Genting Trip!

My 1st time taking the Cable car up to Genting

The view from top,breath taking :D

I keep seeing this sign wherever I go
My man brain reads : If u are a female,do not step on the escalator xD

More trees on the way up~

I met Optimus Prime :D

At the arcade..

Everyone is excited about the trip ^^

Can u see the Pagoda appearing from the mist? :D

A random Chocolate Indulgence cake I happen to buy for my girl <3
I treated her to it,and she carved sumthing for me :o

After the Genting trip,we went for K :D

Translation :
If ur taller than me,the boss says u gotta pay
lol.

Best trip EVER!
We gotta do this again lol

======================

Cooking at my hse + Stayover
(2 weeks ago lmao)

Wondering whats he looking for lol

The feast everyone prepared

From the kitchen,looking out lol xD

W.T.F? lol
:o

The fishy thing that my girl made
It was a delicious appetizer

A glass of milk! :D

Deformed sausages
They were STEAMING for 20mins :P

Whats he doing? -.-

The 2 boys cooking

Vege thingy
Looks like cow-feed lol

Dunno whats this,but I found this pic in my hp

Saw this car while shopping at 1u

My dear Alice~ <3
Dunno whats she so shy about lol

Everyone busy at work

Good job everyone :D

Time flies when u have so much fun...

Till then :)

DotA 2!!

2011-08-17T21:54:00.000-07:00

Scoreboard on the left now

Radiant's fountain with no merchants in sight

Banning pick screen

Loading page lol

Lion's ultimate

---------------------

Pics and changelogs noted. WIll post my observations here

Notes :

1) Sven's stun now changed to a beam energy emitted from the sword

2) Lion's stun changed to a fireball thingy emitted from his staff.

It pops u out of the ground at the end resulting in a stun. (more impressive and animation is faster),Ulti reminds me of Ironman's repulsor cannon blast

3) Shadow Shaman still summons Snakes for his Serpent wards.
His ether shock and grasp looks more amazing. (He says : Hold! or Pull! when he shackles an enemy)

4) Tidehunter carries a fish which he slaps u with (lol)
Tidehunter now SPITS at u (His gush now becomes a spit in YOUR FACE. Ewwww..)

5) Blink Dagger looks like a Kukri

6) Battlefury looks like the Axe shown in the DotA2 Trailer

7) Radiance looks the same (glowing sword),Manta style is a light blue axe with 3 shadows behind it

8) Vanguard looks the same (Spectre obtained it)

9) Magic stick is the glowing stick that every hero obtains

10) Fountain has no merchants anymore

11) Pulling creeps from the side on the top lane still works (someone did it ingame)

12) Scoreboard now on the left

13) When an allly purchases an item (eg. vanguard,blink dagger) there will be an announcement on the screen to ur allies 'eg. Spectre has purchased vanguard'

14) Female announcer (will announce when u are attacking a tower and when ur tower is under attack)

15) When denying creeps, the '!' still remains the same but it will trigger a character's personal line
(eg. CM : Denied! WR : I don't think so!)

16) Characters will exclaim and mention what rune they found when they obtained it.

Hero lines heard so far :

Shadow Shaman (Rhasta) : Don't kill..the messenger!! (On death)
; I slough off.. physical existence (On death) *Meaning to say,he cast off physical existence lol*

Tidehunter :
I pull you to the BOTTOM *sinister snicker*
; U drown..in BLOOD.
; I bring sad tidings.. UR DEAD.
; RIP..TIDE!
; To the bottom I go.. (On death)
; Ebb tide.. (On death)

Lion : My pride.. YOUR FALL (after he ulti'ed)
; WOAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (On kill,evil laugh lol)
; Death to all betrayers! (On kill)

Enigma : I dissolve..but will return later (On death)

Anti-mage : Thou art Purified!

Anti-mage : What is this?! (On death)

Shadow Shaman : Oooooh! What a BURN! Ha ha ha ha ha..(on using Ether Shock to kill)

Lion : I will have my revenge.. (On death)

Wind Runner : My arrow lies..broken (On death)

Spectre : Hahahahahaha!!! (Evil laugh on kill)

Vengeful Spirit : The links are broken..

Wind Runner : U HIT..A GUUUUUUUURLLLL!! (On death,exclamation in surprise)

Doom Bringer : I fall..to the Seven hells (On death)
; My fireeeee.. (On death)

Lich : Back..to the black pool. (On death)
; Oooohh.. temperature. (On death,lol)
; Again?! (On death)
; Winter..has ended. (On death.)

Sand King : Its good to be king. (On kill)

Lina : My fever breaks.. (On death)
; Turn me over.. untouched. (On death)

Weaver : Its lagging ur timeline. (On kill)

Puck : Let the world end now.. It matters not,to me. (On death)
; It changes to.. NOTHING! (On death)

Beast Master : My masterpiece! (On kill)

The future in ur hands

2011-08-09T05:42:00.001-07:00

Alright guys I'm back..
Been awhile anyways :)

So yeah,recently my Uncle came over for dinner. *actually,he came over 1 hr ago lol.*
We talked bout many things,but one of the topics in particular caught my interest.

US is caught in an overwhelming USD 14.@%#&@ trillion debt

WHAT?

really? :o

Thats Uncle Sam's WTF face lol

Yeah yeah,I was probably outdated,didn't read the papers much yadayadayada..
Go ahead and mock me for being so surprised at this

Then again,go ahead and mock everyone else who can't be bothered bout the world
All they care is the fact that Paramount might be coming to Malaysia.

Even so,thats a big IF. Not confirm yet lol.

So yeah,juz incase u miss it tl;dr *too long don't read*

-------------------------------

Right so we (me and my uncle) discussed bout some economics and theories
He's a accountant so he gave an insight on this issue which I find very interesting

After dinner,I went to do my own research

and found.. this :

Gerald Celente was the man my Uncle was referring to (he probably forgotten his name)
Gerald appeared on numerous news channels to discuss US's fate in the year 2012

U can watch the video here if ur interested
Nothing economy related,but more of interesting facts and what he thinks of the year 2012

1)US will fall and become an undeveloped country

2) Riots and revolution (over the sky rocketing taxes and food)

3) Xmas 2012 will be more focused on providing food on the table for most families,rather than shopping and buying toys and xmas trees.

4)Many corporate giants will fall,along the way trampling all over the people below them

My Uncle describe US dying a slow painful death,but not before Europe does.
The fact that a lot of his clients and ppl around him are converting Euros to Swiss currency does make sense. Swiss currency being backed by GOLD. While Euros WAS once backed by gold.

Based on what my Uncle said,whichever country holds the gold,the currency will definitely stay strong.
Based on what I read,US once climbed to a currency peak due to the fact that during the Vietnam war era (Nixon's rule),the US currency was backed by Gold.

As time pass,greed and personal gain reduced the US currency's backing to nothing more than 'imaginary gold'.

My Uncle pointed out that bcuz all the people in possession of a large sum of Euros converted their funds to Swiss franc (the currency),this caused the Europe economy to plunge towards a faster and much more painful death.

According to Mr. Celente,the US dollar will be devalued by as much as 90%

No magic bullets/short cuts. 40 years of debt ain't gonna disappear over a fortnight.
Looks like Obama happen to pick up Bush's shyt right after all the fundings went to his phantom 'war on terror'. lol

------------------------

Could 'they' be involved?

Frankly I'm taking this part here with a pinch of salt
So should you :)

Its possible that they could be the one manipulating the economy from behind.
After the collapse of the economy around the World Superpower nations..
Its possible that the Illuminati might move in to make a move

Unite the world's economy and nation
And perhaps try to save whatever left of it

Who knows? lol.
Im juz sayin' it could happen

But anyways the take home message of the day is :

SPENT WHAT U CAN AFFORD,NO MORE THAN THAT
-Dun spend a penny more than u can afford.-
Gerald Celente, on ways to survive the economy meltdown.

Till then,

A caring touch

2011-07-31T20:15:00.000-07:00

I was sick and helpless :(

But u,didn't give up on me..

U never stopped moving

U took care of me..

I was feverish,yet u kept going.

Finding ways to nurse me back to health..

Thank you Dear~

Ur the best gf! <3

Till then,

Btw I saw E.T,utterly disgusting mv.
It was pratically screaming sex all the way.

The Human Being

2011-07-18T06:33:00.000-07:00

The Human Being

Is capable of achieving many feats..
Is capable of learning..
Is ever evolving in terms of intellect..
Is a free-spirited creature..
Is creative and inventive..
Is capable of self-preservation..
Is able to stand strong as one,stronger and better as a team..
Is able to create a better future for tomorrow..
Is amazing in every way..

The Human being..

Is ever destructive..
Is capable of tearing this world apart..
Is corrupted by greed and lust for power..
Is capable of backstabbing one another
Is capable of deceit,lies..disunity and disruption of peace..
Is capable of destroying everything..
Is shallow and easily corrupted
Is ever envious of another human being..
Is never satisfied with whatever achieved..

All of us are built with short comings..

Call it manufacturer defects.. God's little slip of hand..
Watever.

None of us is perfect.

By standing side by side,we form a better team by patching each other's short comings..

Acknowledging my own shortcomings.. is the 1st step towards a better tomorrow.
I just did,have u?

Till then,

Oh yeah,I drew this xD

A short moment here.

2011-07-18T02:27:00.001-07:00

Before I get to the main topic at hand,I've been trying to get Maliken to become an early game Ganker with Sword of the Damned and Sword throw maxed out early by level 9. A whooping 330 dmg to the enemy. *ouch* It would be more useful anyways to abuse the early game burst of damage. Also working my way towards triple stacking to get that burst of 2000G. Not easy.

Managed a double stack at most. I'd probably take bottom lane for hellbourne anytime cuz of this.

Right,so this small post discusses the items for Maliken.

Frankly I think Steamboots,Whispering Helm and Shrunken Head is more than ENOUGH for Maliken.

Here's the main course,a small recommendation from someone.

The debate :

Post haste,Helm of the Black Legion,Nullstone..seriously?

So u'd trade away attack speed+small health gain for Post haste? Not worth it. at all.

Post haste cost 2700,

Steamboots a mere 1450. And u get so much more synergy with the latter.

Helm of the black Legion,why the heck would u need this?
Maliken is NOT a tanker. Regardless of anything,he is never and would never EVER be a Tanker. He is a Strength DPS-er/Early==Late game carry. A little soft during mid due to a lack of items,but once u glide past that phase,ur stepping into a world of pain when he initiates with sword throw followed by an Ulti.
I dun care what u think,but not all strength heroes are meat heads/tankers. Good job overlooking that fact.

Why would u need extra health and regen from a tank item? That totally contrast skill 3 (Hellbourne Zeal) Ur suppose to loose HP and gain it back via lifesteal (Whispering Helm) and at the same time dishing out a massive DPS with skill 3. Way to phail on recommending items.

Helm of the Black Legion =>
Lifetube (875) + Beast Heart (1100) + Shield (250) = $2225

Whispering Helm =>
Helm of the Victim (950) + Hungry Spirit (900) = $1850
*allows u to dominate a creep to do more incredible things than tanking*

And can be UPGRADED to this =>

Lastly,Nullstone..

Shrunken Head for Magic immunity (+Attack,and health) > Nullstone that blocks one spell and does absolutely nothing more.

Nullstone =>
Sustainer (1750) + Blessed Orb (2100) + Recipe (1000) = $4950 Blocks 1 spell only

Shrunken =>
Warhammer (1600) + Might Axe (1000) + Recipe (1300) = $3900 and a 10sec spell debuff

Disgusting item suggestions..

Don't teach me how to play MY hero,rookie

Till then,

Awesome Sword ftw

2011-07-17T08:53:00.000-07:00

I'm not qualify to write bout Maliken lol.

Probably wait another 15 yrs la,wait till I start playing HoN like a pro.

One thing for sure,taunting ur oppponents and showing off with Maliken is fun.

Sword of the Damned.

I need one of this. lol.

Till then,

Decepticons..mobilize. It is time.

2011-07-14T03:33:00.001-07:00

A little sneak peek at what I was drawing.

Might be a comic,might not.

Designed 3 Decepticons today

------------------

Spearhead,a Decepticon warrior with advance optic sensors.
Transforms into a Mitsubishi Lancer

Patrol,3rd and last Decepticon of 3 siblings.
Becomes a modified WAJA.

Raidor (thought of police RAIDS)
2nd brother of the 3 siblings.
Becomes a Nissan Xtrail
Sniper and cover fire,stands from far and fires.
Also has a Radar to scan from far.

I've desgined 3 Autobots to pit against the 3 Police vehicle siblings.

A Hind-D helicopter,a fire dept. supply truck and a Proton Saga. Yes.. Its a SAGA.

The drafts are up already,I'm juz lazy to finalize it.
Kinda tired from drawing these 3.

Till then,

Kaleidoscope.

2011-07-13T23:36:00.000-07:00

-Teamwork-

It keeps the game running..
It keeps the game alive..
It opens all possibilities..
It keeps the productivity optimized..

1 leader,the rest follower
Or is that the only thing u see in mind?

In teamwork,there's no leader..
Only concerned crew members

In teamwork,there's no self-gain..
Only team achieved victory

In teamwork,there's no personal glory and triumph..
Only a common goal and aim

In teamwork,u sacrifice for the greater good..
Only a fool listens to himself instead of the whole team.

Watching a broadcast of a Nascar race going on yesterday,I can't help but stare all amazed by their impressive teamwork. It is really impressive. Someone will be ready to remove the tyre,the 2nd guy fits in the new tyre and leaves,giving space for the last person to fix the tyre in place and the car is good to go. Absolutely perfect teamwork and co-op dynamics..

Why can't we function like that?

Perhaps its time to learn huh?

=======================

Kaleidoscope

1. A toy consisting of a tube containing mirrors and pieces of colored glass or paper, whose reflections produce changing patterns that are visible through an eyehole when the tube is rotated.

Let me show u those reflections from my Kaleidoscope..

My reaction when I saw the toilet in Blitz..
W.T.F?! The bowl was full so they got a tong to contain all ur filthy piss..

From my view..
Notice the piss overflowing on the floor.

Poster on Mc.D The most disgusting and gay ass one ever. lol

Thanks to Tha Kang playing that stupid song lol,
this was what I imagined when I saw the poster.

Lmao

Till then,

Coming Soon

2011-07-10T12:20:00.000-07:00

Food for thought :

Yum yum here

and for something bitter,here

Constantly updating.

Once I've read enough FACTS and not the bullcrap that Berita Harian served..

I will post my thoughts and blog about it (don't worry peeps,full reference included,I'll cite what I read and post a discussion based on it)

Till then,

Next Update coming soon:Brewing storms.

Bag full o' goodies

2011-07-10T10:59:00.001-07:00

Right,so I have lots of random things to blog *bitch* about.

First of all,I'm not ranting. Just giving my opinion.

For more info on bitching please refer to this post. Thank you. :)

So anyways yeah,got lots of random topics..

1st up..

*Spoiler alert,skip to Part II if u have yet to watch TF3 DoTM*

Transformers : Dark of the Moon

Seen it twice,1st time was normal screen
The 2nd time being in 3D yesterday.

Animation and CG effects were awesome.
The transforming in slow-mo,Bumblebee catching a screaming Sam and transforming in the process. Yadayadayada.. U know the 'stuff'. I need not elaborate,it is a ROBOT movie after all.
This part here,ain't lacking one bit.

Storyline
Utter BULLCRAP.
Incoherent plot. Bits and pieces here n there that still do not matter to the plot. Here's an example :

Instead of focusing on Sam's new girl walking up the staircase half clothed with a bunny,how about YOU(Michael Bay) tell us why Mudflap and Skids *the autobot twins from RoTF* were absent?

The details were filled in,in the novelisation of DoTM. In the comic adaptation,both were killed right after Ironhide when Sentinel betrayed.

Key points like these were absent,don't get me started on missing Autobots (Jolt,the blue Autobot that electrify Optimus as he receives Jetfire's parts as upgrade) died when Shockwave invaded Nest H.Q

Bay could've cut the crap and fill it in with more essential scenes crucial to help make the movie more fluid. I don't care what you think BUT I find Sam's mom nagging bout relationship and chasing after some WORLD CLASS HOTTY annoying when fact is that Sentinel just ran off with some top secret Autobot technology and has already begun plotting to destroy the world.

Mr.Seymour Simmons (former Sector 7 agent from the 1st movie) flies off his car being tossed by one of the Decepticons,lands on tar road on his back and MIRACULOUSLY survives with only a broken leg. Shudn't he be vegetable or sumthin'?

Acting
Sam's acting was ok,except it kinda gets irritating when he keeps screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and SCREAMING over and over again.
His portrayal of Sam Witwicky while admirable from a certain viewpoint lost its shine midway through the show (note,the part where he drove his car to the Department of health and the guards there deny him entry.He screams all the way when the car is being jacked up,catches his breath and screams again.) The screaming there was absolutely amateurish in portrayal of a hero,who never flinch or shivered one bit when seeing an Alien robot but screams like a little girl when his car is being jacked up. The screaming doesn't end,it continues with SHOOT'EMBUMBAHBEESHOOT'EMMMMMMMM!!!!!!
Screaming aside,the rest of the scenes were pretty decent.

Carly Spencer(Sam's new gf)
She can't act. The end.
And I find her Brit accent a tad annoying.
LUUUUUKE GAIS!
(Look guys).
Seriously,it sounded like that when she said : Look guys.
Her scene with Megatron brought his badassery level down to nothin' more than a mere vegetable pussyhead.
"ur nothin' more than sentinel prime's bitch" <= Whoever that wrote this script line should be fired.

The final verdict :
I'd wait for it to come out on local TV than watch it on the big screen and come out all meh and disappointed. lol.
*I.M.H.O In my Humble Opinion*
(2.5-3)/6 (barely passable only becuz the robot fight scenes were good.)

This would've been an ideal ending :

Wheeljack(Named as "Q" in the movie,a clear reference to the Q from J.Bond)
Why the heck does an Autobot with such an awesome name need to be renamed as sumthin' parodied from a J.Bond movie? I thought Autobots all had SPECIAL names for a reason..

Mirage(named as Dino in the movie)
More scenes of him in the comic,he's called Mirage for a reason..
He can cloak and take out Decepticons smoothly like a ninja.

One of the dumbest scenes in the movie *I couldn't find a real pic from the movie so I drew*
Optimus offers Sentinel Prime the Matrix of Leadership right after his revival..
but Sentinel Prime DOESN'T TAKE IT?! WTF..
He could've trashed Optimus and did watever he wanted if he took it.

Certified villain. Nuff said.

She can't act for nuts.

=========================

Right,all jokes aside. Lets get down to something more serious here on local soils

BERSIH 2.0
(even typing it out makes me shiver.)

Well I'm not talking bout anything here. I don't pick sides *though I'm more biased towards the power of the people rather than the Gov.*

Anyways I'm more focused *and concern* bout this little picture down here :

W.T.F?!

Is that..

photoshop I'm seeing?

No seriously,if u asked me I think I'm calling this picture FAKE n GAY.

Mr.Editor here probably just cut out some random looking Al-bombadier la Tabutt and pasted it there. Look at the effects of the smoke and check out that awesome clear shadow effect on the terrorist. Clearly fake. and. gay. Awesome man,perhaps its time to fire the fella thats been doing all ur photo editing and GET A REAL PHOTOGRAPHER WHO TAKES PICTURES AND ONLY PORTRAY THE TRUTH. Great job man,now everyone knows the news and photos u took might have been tampered without knowledge.

Photo comes from here.

and of course,

I just had to do this :

Its getting late,so yeah kinda sleepy.

Not feeling well,throat all sore from yelling

I'll see y'all pansies around sometime soon

Till then,

lmaoatmegatrongettingownedbyoptimusprimein10secs

Our return to Penang :D

2011-07-04T00:37:00.000-07:00

Day #1

Alright,long post ahead.

Lots of pictures.

Lets go thru the pictures 1st shall we? ;)

*Note,they aren't arranged*

Upon arrival at Queensbay mall,I saw this :D
They were having a promo for Dark of the Moon *btw the movie sucks :( *

After the night shift,he'll transform and roll out ;)

Aeroline Bus. Very fancy and high class =.=

The Decepticons have taken over Queensbay Mall :O

My mum's alma mater. Penang Girl's Highschool.

Kai Xi,very excited bout the trip. We ended up playing Bingo for 4 hrs xD

Why is this picture even here.LOL
He was very sleepy. Kept sleeping all day lol.

Pubic hair on Siu mai lmao.

The living room,where we stayed.

Toy Museum in Penang,Solid Snake aka Big Boss from MGS 3

Chun Li and all the fighting girls from 2D fighting games <3

Ah My Goddess

Dim Sum breakfast :D
I had 10 dimsums only,including 2 fried ones ;)

Iron Man!

Stop humping Old snake WOODY!

Char's Zaku II!

Quite a view from bottom :D

This toy is freaking expensive! Wanted to get it but realize I was going broke =.=

Had lots of fun in Penang.

Had Char Kuey Teow for 4 meals,back to back lmao
*High Blood Pressure ftw*

Played Bridge and Goldfish till late night :D

Till then,

Stay tune for more update.

I'm not lying..

2011-06-30T06:39:00.000-07:00

On behalf of no one..

This is my blog..

It speaks the truth..

I'll be away,on a trip

Frankly I dun like to stereotype ppl..but this ain't MY trip

So I can't do anything.

I'm sorry.

Later,till then..

Your requeim

2011-06-22T23:56:00.001-07:00

Your requiem,

Don't pluck the strings of hate

Don't play the chord of discord

Don't play the note of distrust

Don't strum the tune of anger

Don't hum the song of disunity

Just don't sing a note on the requiem of destruction.

Fine dining~

2011-06-22T23:12:00.000-07:00

----------------------------

Today's menu :

Gossiping about some dead roach

Dessert :

Trolling someone else

**Comes with complementary tissues to wipe ur mouths after all that gossips**

========================

PROFESSIONAL EXAMINATION TO BECOME BITCH PRO
(12M maximum)

Time : 6.00AM - 9.00PM

Venue : Anywhere

Examiner : Lee Ah Cow

Section A

Questions :

1)Describe the above graph (1M)

Titled,The art of bitching. It is essentially a Annoyance vs Gossip graph.

2)Explain what happens during the 1st part of the graph (6M)

During the 1st half of the graph,the level of annoyance increases as the gossips continue. It is postulated that this is due to the fact that the gossips are aimed at a specific individual. Hence as a group of people keep gossiping,they will get more and more annoyed as time passes. The annoyance will eventually peak and that is when the bitchness and gossip level of everyone is at max. There won't be anymore annoyance as all the annoy receptors have been saturated.

As time passes and more gossips flow in,those that gossip will eventually get tired and sick of gossiping. That is when the level of annoyance falls and people get sick and tired of gossiping.

3)Explain the 2nd half of the graph and why the curve is inversed? Give 2 reasons why the curve is inversed. (4M)

As time passes and more gossips continue to pour in,now the annoyance level is reflected and inversed. The people that gossip become annoyed and the person gossiped is now totally immune to it. 2 reasons why the curve of annoyance is inversed : A person has heard enough and is annoyed (No new info is flowing in,the same ol' gossip is flowing around and coming in and out to the extent that it is being mentioned at a person's leisure). And also due to the fact that some people had enough and are already all cooled down but the one gossiping enraged him again.

4)Conclude the graph (1M)

As gossiping prolongs,the level of annoyance will peak and eventually only the person gossiping feels it. The one being gossiped is totally immune to it.

========================

Gossiping is fine..
We do it sometimes subconsciously..
But once that peak is over

And a person's inner peace is restored

Pls..don't throw any new ember into the pit of hatred and anger

Don't start another wild fire

I've seen him cool down and laugh with us

Then came a random charcoal u tossed that started a whole new flame war..

It may have started..may not,who knows?

The peak of that issue is over,let it die

Nothing new to discover,we all know whats she like

Let it die.

Puta madre

Till then,

GEE-ZUS!

2011-06-16T03:28:00.000-07:00

Omg la~

=.=

Too...lazy....to.....care.

*Dies*

Troll someone,gets trolled back.. Q_Q

I shud stop trolling lmao

trolololololol~

Till then,

I L.M.F.A.O

2011-06-14T05:10:00.000-07:00

Lmfao? No no.. not the version that u know. ;)

It stands for I Love.My.Freaking.Amazing.yObo~ <3

Dear,

I know this week is driving u nuts (And its only Tuesday! Gasp! :O)
We got another 1 day (Or 2 days incase I can't make it 2moro)

But I juz want u to know this..

At the end of a long tunnel,is hope..

At the end of darkness..is light.

At the end of despair, is rebirth..reform.

I know ur thinking bout me (like mad)

I know u miss me (So do I !)

I know u love me (No matter how much I love u,u always insist u love me more -.- )

I know u want to see me..

(So do I,if only u lived at the end of my street >_<)

Dear no matter what,u have to keep pushing on.

Giving up is not an option.

We've come this far.

Its alright to cry..

Its alright to look out the window hoping I would be there..

Its alright to think bout me..

I would have done the same if I was in ur situation.

I feel so hopeless seeing u like that sometimes,it really hurts.

Im here to cheer u on and support u no matter what!

I LOVE U! (a lot)

All the best. My prayers are with u. U better make it out alive on Friday and cook me spaghetti WOMAN xD

<3

Till then~

My sunflower

2011-05-17T09:53:00.000-07:00

"My sunflower~"

My sunflower is bright..
She tells me whats right.
And makes sure I'm alright..
She's precious,always in my sight.

Have u seen my sunflower?
She is my lover..
I'll do all thats within my power,
To look for her.

My sunflower beams proudly,
Whenever I show my love for her
She opens up brightly
And I feel warm and comfortable all over..

Have u seen my sunflower?
My thoughts ran all over..
My feelings true to her,forever
I want to protect her.

Time pass by,my dear Sunflower..
I held on strong and firmly believed
We will be united soon,however..
I want to see ur bright smile heaved.

Fear not,my Sunflower..
The sun will shine once more..
Time itself will not stop our endeavour
To meet and embrace once more.

My Sunflower be brave!
Ur love is all I crave.
So go out,and seek forth those challenges
Cut forth a future,be relentless..

Have u seen my sunflower?
Not anymore?
Bcuz she is mine forever.
Always withing my heart,united once more.

Have u seen my sunflower?

she is always in my heart. cuz it shines brightly,knowing that she is there for me.. Time is nothing more than a temporary obstacle. I miss her a lot,and a lot has happen. It is time..to make it happen.

Till then

The silent symphony

2011-05-17T08:23:00.000-07:00

The Silent Symphony
A collection of 4 simple poems/riddles

#1 "The Queen of Hearts"

Like the piano,she plays..
And like the piper,she seduce..
A foul smell from a mile away.
It reeks of the poison she use

The lake mirrors a reflection..
Regardless to where she run..
Clouded and blinded by intention
The lake blackens under the sun

A forest with two paths..
Yet she walks none..
Fragile and cruel,she laughs..
I have tempted,yet remain as one

A queen of hearts
To the delight of men,full of charm
The piper nails them like darts,
For they see her do no harm.

****************

#2 "The chair"

In the corner of my mind..
I see you sitting with a glass of wine,
In the corner of my mind..
I see you holding something once mine.

Though masked and majestically poised,
You deceive no one..
Though masked and majestically poised,
Your actions speak for all u've done.

From my eyes..
I see a glass of chardonnay,
From ur eyes..
I see a kind soul,twisted away

From my heart..
I see a light fading fast..
From ur heart..
The decision u have yet to cast.

*****************

#3 "A play for Fools"

To be loved or love?
Fools drown themselves
For they see no one else
Somehow obvious to ourselves..

To be loved or love?
Fools give it all away
Yet they are still fools..
For they are nothing but actors..in a play.

To be loved or love?
A well executed charade
Became the temptation,a bait
Fools ignore the words said.

To be loved or love?
All that is fake has vanish
Now thats left is to perish
There is nothing more to cherish..

***************

#4 "The distant Sonata"

I watched u walked alone..
My back turned,I said farewell
For the future,no one could have known..
Ur shadow disappeared,as well.

I watched u suffer,in darkness..
Yet I shower myself with hope
For ur future,be filled with brightness
The burden I thought,U could cope.

I heard u sank down in despair..
Yet I sat there watching
We watched,unaware..
That ur light is already disappearing.

I saw ur thoughts all tangled..
Yet I refused,any participation
Enough is enough..

The time is now.

Sonatas are normally played in the same key,however if something remains off key forever..

Till then

Their own paths

2011-05-16T22:54:00.000-07:00

"Their own paths"

A friend once said..
The road I choose
Will require no aid..
For I have nothing to lose.

Said friend walked on..
Into the sunset long gone..
A worried look remained..
When will we see him,again?

Pardon me Young Lady~
Did he past u already?
My friend I seek..
Full of lies,u reek.

What have u done?
In his heart,that light gone..
Once pure and sincere..
Now despair,is all thats clear.

An abyss full of lies..
All that awaits,
Is never ending cries..
How long,will u have him as bait?

My lady..for u are the poison
The young lad's very reason,
To seek forth ur love..
But,Lies and deceit lie above.

When will we see that same sunset together again,ol' friend?

That look in ur eyes,no longer the same.

I cry watching the sand blown around as the wind toys with it..

The path of Pain

2011-05-16T21:44:00.000-07:00

"The strength behind ur back.."

Friends..

Are those who will fight along ur side..

Are those who will give u a hand when u nid it..

Are those who will dust off ur shirt and pants when u fall..

Are those who will ask u..Does it hurt? And where?

Are those who will help u unconditionally..

Are those who will never question loyalty,but instead do things where he/she sees fit..

Are those who do something good,but expect ntg back in return..

Are those who truly care for u..and thus will do anything to protect u..

----------------------------

"Love,reality's own coffee.. Ur soul is addicted to~"

Lovers

Are those who love u unconditionally.. There's no pre-requisite requirements.

Are those who truly felt a spark when they first met u,and have since then blieved in fate and destiny..

Are those who will never try to hurt u no matter what,they cry when u hurt urself bcuz the pain they felt is 3 times the pain u felt..

Are those who are always concern for u,they will help u no matter what..

Are those who will understand u no matter what..they will always think from ur side and imagine how things are like for u..before making a move.

Are those who will cry when they see u trouble,a slight sign of danger is all it takes to trigger genuine and sincere tears..

Are those who love u for who u are..if not,why start dating u? They won't ever complain and ask their partner to change.. After all what attracted them to u is who u really are. If ur asked to change,it defeats the purpose of falling in love..

Are those who will never give u trouble,they'd walk the extra mile as long as it means they get to see u smile at the end..

<=================>

Lovers have the potential to be ur soul mate,but its not necessary and not confirmed that they are..

Know this..despair is never part of the Love vocabulary. Bcuz if ur partner truly loves u..they will never leave u that way.

A girl/guy that truly loves u,will not consider ur background or merely take u out and lead u on just bcuz ur the best there is for now. But rather fall in love with u gradually and naturally for the way u are.

Not everyone has this six sense in love..

But..

When u truly like someone..u'd realise u tend to do things for that person.

Sometimes u may not say it out,but ur actions speak louder than words..
So what if u dun talk more,does it mean that ur less better than a jerk who lies a lot and talks more than u?

Sometimes it may not be obvious..but ur tone when talking shows ur worried..

Sometimes it may hurt,but the things u say are for his/her own good..

Sometimes it may be hard to do,but u'll always figure a way to hold him/her close to u.
Theres no nid for pre-written scripts. Ur not acting in a drama so don't kid urself by thinking of what to say before hand. U shud be comfortable talking bout anything under the sun cuz this might very well be the girl u'll spend ur life with.

No one writes the script for ur love life..ever.

No one tells u what to do next or determines ur phase..

Bcuz no one can write out ur future and happiness..

True happiness is a right everyone deserves..

"Are u still smiling like how the 1st time she told u she love u?

It may start sweet..but how bout now?

Is it still holding up well? How is ur partner doing,and how is he/she supporting u when ur in a difficult situation?"

All these matters,cuz love is not always sweet.
Its like coffee,bitter cuz reality is a bitch and will always throw an obstacle ur way..

But that satisfaction ur soul gets,the taste of companionship is sweet.. Only the select few can run a relationship that is well balanced,and only them will understand how love really taste like.

U determine it urself,its one of those love stories u write now. And will eventually be passed on to ur kids as a story of how u and ur partner met.

Till then~

If a Tree falls..does it make a sound?

2011-05-08T09:16:00.000-07:00

"If a Tree falls does it make a sound?"
Is meant as a riddle that raises question regarding observation and knowledge in reality.

What determines whether a context posted is within the acceptable frames of reality? What determines whether the structure of a sentence said or written has no hidden forms of deceit within them?

**Upon stepping into my blog,u have already agreed that u are to read the following materials published here and not have an opposing view on it,basically because its my blog. If u can't accept it,go else where. These are my views,theres no need to get upset because ur view differ. I do however accept constructive discussion though. However if ur intentions are to get red and angry at me,I'm afraid to say that u shud take things lightly and view life in a different angle. Cuz these are my thoughts. Who are u to disagree on them? Lastly,I blog to tell out my personal view on life. I dun scrutinize people specifically. My blog is not a ranting spot bout some jerk that destroyed my life.**

So...u agree? Alright. Let us proceed then.

We shall discuss this in the following article below :

I'll do a little story telling before I proceed.

Once upon a time *Argh,screw this shit*
In Arab,there was a renown artist that painted on dried animal skin and sold the portraits for high prices. His art was famous across the land.

Recently,he completed a painting of a girl.
Life-like and beautiful,yet alluring and was one painting that would tinker with the human mind. *Think of Mona Lisa,many still wonder till date is it a Man/Woman*

The next day,the art was unveiled to the public at an exhibition..

But many were surprised.

"Is that an angel?" One said.
"Nah it can't be,I saw the Devil in it!" Yelled a man from across the Square.

Discussion occur and rumor spreaded like wild fire that the artist painted a picture filled with different influences to temper with the human mind. And that it was a dastardly picture. None could really tell whether the picture portayed 1)A Human 2) An Angel or 3) A devil.

And no one would buy the painter's argument.

"But I am but a painter! I paint for a living! I draw every of my art with sincerity and produce such arts to impress u all. There was no such thought of drawing anything else while I was painting. It was and will always be strictly a painting..of a girl!"

His arguments fell upon deaf ear. No one would listen to a liar.

---------------------------------------

U see..this was the case that happen most recently. I'm not gonna beat around the bush. Rather,I will approach this method systematically.

1)The painter merely painted the picture. Had no intentions of drawing anything else in mind. He merely painted what he imagined in his mind during that time (An image of a girl). All in all,it was painting.

2)The people saw it differently. They saw the picture as anything other than what it was portraying. Some saw it as good (The angel) while others saw it as bad (The devil).

3)The people lost track of the main focus in this scenario. What was the painter painting? A girl. But it was individual perception that draw them closer into thinking that the painter was manipulating the people and tricking them with mind illusions.

The story above basically summed up a small misunderstanding that happen. You see,as a painter..I paint honest pictures from the fabric of reality. From the very eyes I use to see,I describe them carefully and mainly translate them properly. I did not add any spices,or extra ingredients. It was what I saw,and my very account and experience. Crystal clear,and honest..

So,if u were to see my depictions of an event that occur wrongly..were it to be my fault for portraying it wrongly? Hopefully no offense taken..but isn't what I'm depicting the truth? Its reality. I didn't change a bit of it. I didn't add additional stories to make it look nicer right? Its factual.. Concrete proof.

So if this is the case,why would the words deceive..betrayal and backstab be used?

Does anyone even know what backstab means?

Backstab (Betrayal) :is the breaking or violation of a presumptive contract, trust, or confidence that produces moral and psychological conflict within a relationship amongst individuals, between organizations or between individuals and organizations.(Wiki,shit source I know)

To backstab someone,u have to have some sort of emotional bridge linked with the other person. U have to know him/her. Problem is...I know nothing. So how does this qualify under betrayal/backstabbing? The statement is therefore rejected.

In order to backstab..there must be a lie/deceit spreaded to cause mistrust and hence betrayal among 2 people/a group of people. Contradicting to that,I merely painted out fractions of reality in my depiction of events. I never once added anything extra or out of context. Not a pinch of my personal view on the matter. Nothing. I stated facts and for that was condemned a betrayer. I spoke the truth which I've seen from my own eyes..and re-translated them onto a new form to be explored by others. So why am I,for that a backstabber? Who really has a grasp of reality now?

"Lets say ur school suddenly had a new student. And it was made known that this new student,A had a bad history record. If I said that Person A was a school bully last time that had a bad school record to another fellow student (who was absent during the announcement) on a pretext of warning my fellow friends to be careful, Am I backstabbing Person A?"

Why so if u answered yes? What trust have I betrayed?
I was merely stating the truth am I not? And there was no consequences to be held against me because it was the truth and nothing but the truth.

That was an example of my case. I was the one telling my other friends to be careful of Student A. I painted nothing but the truth but was mentioned a backstabber indirectly. Though the jab wasn't brutal to the heart,but I felt uncomfortable and pondered. Why am I a backstabber? In what way have I betrayed anyone?

Then I came up with the reasoning (The story about the painted and the girl picture).

If a person was to speak about another,but the words spoken were of nothing but the truth..despite it being an ugly truth...why is this consider an act of betrayal/backstabbing? No matter how u try to change it,its the truth. Despite it being a bad and ugly truth. Something ridiculous and nonsensical, u can't change it bcuz its a FACT. And stating facts to another person contradicts the act of betrayal because lies,deceit and gossip are spreaded to cause mistrust.

U can't have backstabbing if u merely spoke of facts right? Bcuz there is ntg to argue. There is no way that a person can deny that,bcuz its a fact..fullstop.

Sometimes we talk and communicate,till we lost track of reality and the things we see with our own eyes. For eg. Take the story about the arabic painter above. Whats reality? The painting is of a girl. No matter what its a painting. But what do u see? Could be anything but the girl.

As for the concept of betrayal,speaking of the truth never will account for betrayal of trust. NOT at least when u still do not have any trust or contract linked to the other person. I have no link with the other person (Eg. B),so no matter what it will never be an act of betrayal. Bcuz I had no contract and emotional bond to this person. Hence it will not trigger any sentimental bias or trauma feedback that I'm betraying sumone else.

So..all in all,does speaking about a person whom u have no link to whatsoever count as betrayal?

The ans to my argument is No. Because I share no emotional bond,am not tied down emotionally and chained mentally to the contract of trust. Therefore if I were to breached it,I will definitely feel no emotional trauma or psychological remorse. For I speak the truth. All in all,its the truth.
Take it.

If I paint a story for ur ears,and I added not a pinch of my personal views on it..would u consider that also to be of bias in terms of sentimental values?

The ans for me is No. Basically cuz I didn't add any form of personal view in it. The story portrayed is in its raw form. I didn't alter it I didn't change anything. So why should I be crowned a Bias Bastard that Paints other people Evil?

I posted this not for the sake of annoying people. But rather to speak my mind freely as I wish. I express it here so if by all means u feel like taking out ur hse wall in one punch,kindly leave my blog then do it.

Lastly,a reminder :

**Upon stepping into my blog,u have already agreed that u are to read the following materials published here and not have an opposing view on it,basically because its my blog. If u can't accept it,go else where. These are my views,theres no need to get upset because ur view differ. I do however accept constructive discussion though. However if ur intentions are to get red and angry at me,I'm afraid to say that u shud take things lightly and view life in a different angle. Cuz these are my thoughts. Who are u to disagree on them? Freedom of speech FTW*

Well that concludes my discussion

As a former debate member,I just couldn't let this topic slip by my hands. :)

So....when a tree falls...does it make a sound? ;)

Till then.

거울아 거울아 이 세상에 누가 제일 예쁘니?

2011-05-05T07:58:00.000-07:00

Soooo..right. I'm back. Anyways,anyone ever wonder whats the use of a mirror?

I hear some of u thinking "Duh? To look at myself when I get up!" Well,aside from that.?

Another person says out loud with his thinking cap on : "To do science experiments? How bout driving?" And the list goes on and on~

Well regardless of what ur answer is,the general purpose of the mirror never changes. Its original purpose is to reflect,hence why its created. What people do with it,determines its next course of action,but the mirror itself is unchanged. Forever reflecting.

There are a few concepts worth noticing regarding the mirror :

1) The most famous being Self-reflecting "Reflecting on oneself's actions and thinking."

I'm sure that pretty much explains itself. U do something,then at the end of the day think back whether its the right decision or not. If u made an important decision to do something,u reflect to see if anything has gone wrong. This was one of the most important lesson handed down to me by my Standard 6 teacher. One of our homework to do everyday,was self-reflection. And I have been doing it till now,consciously or subconsciously.

2) The mirror,regardless of anything stays neutral. It mainly reflects what u show to it. But never becomes part of it.

This is the more recent concept that I discovered while sitting down day dreaming. As mentioned above,the mirror merely reflects what is shown. I believe we should try to be like a mirror sometimes when the situation calls for it. Though I can imagine some of u are already scoffing at this idea,probably thinking along the lines like : "This is absurd. Its not that easy in real life etc etc".

As for me,I'm hoping to put this theory into use. But hopefully I won't have to in the future. If a person gets into an argument,and is feeling awful inside..try to reflect all those negative thoughts like a mirror. And look for the positive light. Like wise when facing a difficult task ahead (for eg. an exam) try to reflect back all that stress to ur surrounding and look for a peace of mind to settle down ur thoughts.

Though its only the theory stage now,perhaps with some practical application..this 2 theory might actually work well hand in hand.

Don't worry,if it actually works..I'll let u know k?

*Btw I will lengthen this post once I come up with more philosophical thoughts. So check back once in awhile. For now I got a Gundam to train :D Hehehe,WHAT?! I'm human too k? AND I PLAY GAMES..ESCPECIALLY GUNDAM GAMES*

Till then ;)

Anything under the stars and sky

Now if I may..

An hourglass

Lost.

Time capsule.

The Midnight Ocean

I..

Flashback

The ladder of Insecurity

Renovation time

Educational outlook on the Graph of Human Relation

Invicible Threats

Wind

MAD.I.AM

The Hidden Threat

Eh..I'm getting lazy =.=

DotA 2!!

The future in ur hands

A caring touch

The Human Being

A short moment here.

Awesome Sword ftw

Decepticons..mobilize. It is time.

Kaleidoscope.

*Coming Soon*

Bag full o' goodies

Our return to Penang :D

I'm not lying..

Your requeim

Fine dining~

GEE-ZUS!

I L.M.F.A.O

My sunflower

The silent symphony

Their own paths

The path of Pain

If a Tree falls..does it make a sound?

거울아 거울아 이 세상에 누가 제일 예쁘니?

Coming Soon